A boy who you are making out with, who approaches the state of boyfriend - without ever reaching it.
"My asymptotic boyfriend Matt continued to introduce me as his friend whenever we ran into people he knew while we were out, despite having been dating for a couple of months."
by carlygoodman July 30, 2007
Get the asymptotic boyfriend mug.To overcome limitations, To overcome a challenge, to find meaning and purpose in life, To do anything "geo" (domenico's definition), To transcend into infinity, etc...
by Anonymous27182818 September 18, 2016
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In mathematics, an asymptote is a line that continually approaches a given curve but does not meet it at any finite distance. In other words, though it curves towards zero, it approaches it indefinitely and never actually reaches it.
Asymptoting describes the phenomenon in which despite the regular passage of time, your relative perception of time appears to slow as you get closer to an event, date, time, etc. Because the line never reaches zero, but travels towards it for infinity, you too feel as if you will infinitely travel towards something that you will never reach. Much like the phenomenon of running towards a door in a dream, but never quite reaching it even though you are covering ground.
Asymptoting describes the phenomenon in which despite the regular passage of time, your relative perception of time appears to slow as you get closer to an event, date, time, etc. Because the line never reaches zero, but travels towards it for infinity, you too feel as if you will infinitely travel towards something that you will never reach. Much like the phenomenon of running towards a door in a dream, but never quite reaching it even though you are covering ground.
Rocko couldn't believe his luck! He had just won an all-expenses paid trip to visit Paris, where he could finally meet the girl of his dreams, Claudette! The only problem was that the trip was a whole month away! Poor Rocko. He was so excited to go, that one month felt like six. Time dragged on. Rocko was asymptoting. HARD.
"Why is this year asymptoting?!" Filburt lamented. "I can't wait for it to be over! Oh fishsticks!"
Heffer hated weekly team meetings at the Chokey Chicken. "I'm getting hungry!" Heffer thought to himself. "Surely thirty minutes must have passed." He looked at the clock. To his dismay, only six minutes had gone by. Heffer heard his stomach growl. "Even my stomach is asymptoting!" he thought.
Ed Bighead dutifully went to work every day, dreaming of a day in which he could finally get "the big office." In his younger days, Ed felt a sense of accomplishment with his work at Conglom-O. But now that Ed was pushing 55, he instead felt himself asymptoting; working endlessly towards a goal he would never meet.
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"Why is this year asymptoting?!" Filburt lamented. "I can't wait for it to be over! Oh fishsticks!"
Heffer hated weekly team meetings at the Chokey Chicken. "I'm getting hungry!" Heffer thought to himself. "Surely thirty minutes must have passed." He looked at the clock. To his dismay, only six minutes had gone by. Heffer heard his stomach growl. "Even my stomach is asymptoting!" he thought.
Ed Bighead dutifully went to work every day, dreaming of a day in which he could finally get "the big office." In his younger days, Ed felt a sense of accomplishment with his work at Conglom-O. But now that Ed was pushing 55, he instead felt himself asymptoting; working endlessly towards a goal he would never meet.
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by Justine the Christmas Elf November 18, 2019
Get the Asymptoting mug.At the Beta Sigma Omega Math Olympiads, Devin walked up to Melissa and looked at her graph of the function, and then tried to suavely say "Hey there, lady, nice asymptotes - can I see them closer?"
by Adel7 January 6, 2008
Get the nice asymptotes mug.A friend you have always been close to, and continue to get closer to every day, but you will never date them, because they are an ass.
by RowdyDiversion June 5, 2016
Get the Assymptote mug.A type of sexuality where one participates in nearly all sexual acts, except intercourse. Individuals of this lifestyle are willing to "do things" up until a certain point, but never cross that line or axis of actual intercourse, much like how an asymtote is a curved line that increasingly approaches and axis, but never cross (or penetrate) that line. Mutual masturbation, fellatio, cunninglingus, etc are all fair game, but one's virginity is maintained.
Also called Asymsexual.
Also called Asymsexual.
Because Mary believes in stupid promise rings, she won't have sex until marriage. However, everything else is fair game, including blowies and anal. She is a total Asymptotic Sexual.
by ProfessorOtter December 1, 2013
Get the Asymptotic Sexual mug.A society in which its members are striving to create a utopia while realizing that they can never quite accomplish that goal. Related to the mathematical concept of an asymptote.
by Roger D. Reynolds September 26, 2004
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