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The minutiae that ate my life. 

All of those little things - errands, forms, notes, crap - that seem to totally eat up your day. None of it is exciting and you can't quite believe that at the end of the day, you've nothing to show for it.
"What did you do today, honey?"
"The bank, the carwash, the drycleaners, the drugstore, then back to the bank. It's so boring, I can't talk about it because I get depressed. It's the minutiae that ate my life."

Reaquiring My Life Goals 

Recession speak for "I've been out of work for some time and am bumming around looking for the end of the rainbow while pretending to be cool and in-charge so as not to bruise my fragile over inflated ego"
Office Drone: "Hey bud, how's it going with you?"
Former Coworker: " Aw, it's All Good, I'm just kickin it Reaquiring My Life Goals, finding a path"
Office Drone: "Oh, I see.....you're trying out "Bum" as a lifestyle for awhile then?"
Former Coworker: "Yeah....you got a quarter I could borrow?"

To save my life 

To save my life - Where one simply is really bad at something. Or used as a phrase.
I can't make cookies to save my life.
I can't play netball to save my life.
To save my life by History! November 13, 2016

i generally dislike you as a person and wish to never encounter you ever again for the rest of my life 

When you generally dislike someone and wish to never encounter them again for the rest of your life.
P1: takes a steaming shit on your mattress like the worthless piece of psychotic shit they are
P2: "i generally dislike you as a person and wish to never encounter you ever again for the rest of my life"

Fuck My Life 

Commonly used by the meodramatic who believe they have the worst life in the world, often due to their own actions, when in truth they do not.
The man who invited himself to the bar was playing mind game on her. She didn't want him there, and I could see it in her face. For the last several weeks she had talked nonstop about how something wasn't right about him, which made it hard for her to figure if she could trust him or not.

She looked over at me and mouthed the words "Fuck My Life." Had I known that my attempt at rescuing her from that situation would result in her shunning me, I never would have even tried. She was my best friend, and all I wanted to do was help her out of the same awkward situations she constantly finds herself in. But she preferd to stay there and take the abuse as long as she had a beer in hand. I think deep down, she enjoys fucking her own life for the sole fact that it gives her something to talk about with people so they can feel sorry for her.
Fuck My Life by radar180 December 10, 2016

Worst manicure experience of my life! 

Used to mock someone who is complaining about something that is of little or no importance, showing them that you do not care.
Person 1: I can't believe she got invited to the party before me!
Person 2: Yeah I know, worst manicure experience of my life!
Person 1: Ugh.