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Jesus H. Christ on a Bike

The Irish/UK version of Jesus H. Christ in a Chicken Basket, this phrase is used in extreme situations of shock, surprise, annoyance, or disgust. The addition of a well placed f-bomb can, of course, up the ante considerably.
"Liverpool couldn't beat Sheffield United?! Ah, Jesus H. Christ on a Bike!!!"

Helpful chap in bathroom: "I say, it appears that your penis is dripping a rather greenish looking slime."
You: "What?! JESUS H. FUCKING CHRIST ON A BIKE!!"
by Gaz Edmunds September 17, 2008
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Bong hits 4 Jesus

The act of taking multiple hits from a bong in the name of Jesus.
Kids from Alaska take bong hits 4 Jesus.
by Bonghits4Jesus May 18, 2008
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jesus turd

"jesus turd!!", that fish tastes like spunk.
by Joe Coupons July 2, 2006
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Jesus Rollerblading Christ

An exclamation to be proclaimed in times of great excitement or shock.
"Jesus Rollerblading Christ those giraffes are getting it on!"
by ThatAtheistGuyWithSwords September 2, 2011
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heels to jesus

Heels to Jesus

One of the nicer ways to to describe the penetration of the vagina via the penis. This phrase is best used around family and any other people who may find the words sex, fuck, bang, poke, pork, smash, ram, bump nasties, mix your milk with my coco puffs, and intercourse offensive. To be used judiciously among friends, families, and people you have sex with. There is not a more respectable way of describing the bump and grind than saying you've gone "heels to Jesus."
"Bro, I went heels to Jesus with Becky last night! I swear I had her speaking in tongues."
by _NoneOfYourDamnBusiness_ April 20, 2015
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Jesus Poop

When you take a shit, and you wipe, and the toliet paper is streak-free. This is also known as the "greatest feeling in the world". A JP in the morning, guarantees a great day to come.

It is referred to as a "JP" for short.

May is the official National JP Month
Jesus poops help save the world, by enabling the person to reuse toliet paper.
by Habu May 2, 2008
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jesus clip

A spring clip that holds a pin in place.
Hand me that jesus clip.
<sound of clip flying to the other end of the garage>
Jesus! Where did it go?
by buggum July 6, 2006
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