jack average 

noun
To literally be the most average thing in the entire world. When something is jack average it is beyond "average", it is super average, uber average, extremely average. Often disappointingly average but can be used to just describe something commonplace.

Considering the all the bloody hype, I expected the Warped tour to be extremely freaking awesome, but it was just jack average. So I went home and punched a hole in my wall.

Parkuru, "How's your day going?"

Kezric, "Meh...jack average."

jack average by adelews September 22, 2007

bang average 

Emphatically typical or undistinguished, but used in a context where this is inherently somewhat disappointing.

“I think it’s the worst Liverpool team I have seen in years. They look bang average." - Harry Redknapp
“The start has been bang average over the four league games so far if I’m honest” - Jonathan Woodgate

bang average by dickoon March 3, 2016

Batting Above His Average 

When a male picks up a female substantially more attractive than all his previous efforts in women.

(Derived from the English gentleman’s sport of Cricket)

Terrance: Did you see Ugly Bob’s lady friend?!

Phillip: I did! He’s batting above his average for sure!

Terrance: Pull my finger Terrance!

Batting Above His Average by Cen Bousins February 26, 2009

aggressively average 

a phrase, coined by Zach, to describe inadequate aspects of himself in a more flattering vernacular

Zach: "My dick is aggressively average."

aggressively average by boredandhorny December 29, 2016

bigger than the average player

Justin And Dayal

They're just bigger than the average player

bigger than the average player by qwertyuiolfkzdnhg October 26, 2020

my life is average 

A website where not-so-average people post not-so-average stories, usually about Harry Potter, how much they hate Twilight (they really do hate it), pirates and ninjas, or how they engaged in a random lightsaber duel with their principal, and received a high-five for it. Most entries on the site beg the question "Really?"

Most entries consist of a fantastical story about how wonderfully whimsical their day was, or how awesomely nerdy and clever they are, followed by the phrase "MLIA", which is of course short for the rather untrue "my life is average".

--"Today, in chemistry class, my teacher came in dressed as Professor Snape, and taught us 'Potions' instead of regular chemistry. It's not even Halloween! my life is average."

--"I call bullshit."

my life is average by Architeuthosaurus December 26, 2011

about average 

In the world of online dating portals, this is how fat people describe themselves. Not to be confused with "a few extra pounds", which indicates the person is morbidly obese.

"Her profile said she was 'about average', but it turns out she was WAY too average"

about average by Dan_Maine October 20, 2005