condom

Mans greatest enemy, yet his closest friend...

Person A: I just slammed my penis in a car door!
Person B: Jesus Christ are you OK?!
Person A: dont worry I didnt feel a thing, I was wearing a condom!

by preppyguy21 September 9, 2004

Emotional condom

Mental preparedness for potentially emotionally messy situations, i.e. a one-night stand after a breakup, a confrontation with a friend, coming out of the closet. An emotional condom is the mental parallel to the physical condom - an actual condom keeps your sexual organs from getting damaged, an emotional condom keeps your heart and mind from getting damaged.

"You're going to hook up with him? Fine, but remember to put on your emotional condom."

by Trust me, wear it January 5, 2010

Condom Counter

A girl that counts and keeps count of a guys condoms. She does this to see if she is the only one he is having sex with.

If a guy buys a pack of 3 condoms and uses one with a girl, that girl will keep count of how many condoms that guy should have left and try to trap him when the count doesn't match the total she has been keeping.

That girl is a condom counter... She is always counting my condoms and being all in my business.

by Calvin Scharaldi December 1, 2011

ear condom

An item used to protect ones ear from ridiculous chatter, unwanted sounds, or annoying opinions. Origin: Lady Gaga

Lady Gaga puts on an ear condom when speaking to Alejandro.

by @hollymonster8 May 21, 2011

broken condom

It means you're useless.

Clive acts like he's the goddamn juggernaut but the piece of shit broken condom always came in two seconds and couldn't finish the job.

by Technically a student August 6, 2006

Busted Condom

A man with a shaved head wearing a turtleneck

"Damn, motherfucker, you look like a goddamned busted condom!"

by Jesse Martin February 10, 2005

Dropping a Condom

1. The action of 'breaking the ice' in such a way that you embarrass yourself. Instead of opening up a conversation with you, it results in you being shunned from the conversation and being spoken about badly.

2. The act of preventing an argument by entering the conflict and yelling a profound and unnecessary statement. Can often result in you taking full brunt of both arguing parties rage...but also makes for an amusing story later on in the day.

3. Revealing a contraceptive at an inappropriate occasion, resulting in being disowned by the rest of the group.

4. Opposite of rape, as opposed to being ‘owned’ you own yourself for the better of mankind. Like taking a bullet 'Harrison Ford from The Fugitive Style'. Essentially, taking one for the team with no regard for your own reputation- dropping a condom.

Also: to drop a condom, dropped a condom

1. Wow...he took one for the team there; he really dropped a condom with that joke about dyslexics so I could get her number.

2. Stone: "Bite me"
Wim: "Bring it"
Peter: "I'm wearing your lesbian mothers' underwear!"
Wim And Stone pummel Peter to a pulp.
Toke: "Well, he certainly dropped a condom"

3. "More tea Ethel?"
"Why Thank you Eliza."
Michael *drops condom in teapot* "Wana shag?"
"Good grief Ethel....control your Grandson!"

4. What a guy...dropped a condom, raped himself, but look at all those innocent fools, ignorant of the fact that he saved their asses.

5. Dropping a condom on the situation.

by Raving Professor No Legs July 26, 2006