Chomskamas Claus

(n) - Russian equivalent of Santa Claus, exluding one or more of the following (depending on the region of Russia):
1. cheer
2. jollyness
3. round little belly
4. presents
5. bright colors

"Start a fire, dude!! The Chomskamas Claus is coming to the U.S. this year! Keep that shit burning ALL NIGHT if you know what's good for you! This bastard's totally hardcore!"

by Silent Rip November 30, 2004

Ozempic Santa Claus

When a billionaire spends too long in the K-hole

Wow, when that rocket guy finally made it back, he looked like an Ozempic Santa Claus

by NotHalfBad333 December 27, 2024

Santa Claus

The only known person with immunity to diabetes and obesity-related death. He’s normally found in malls around Christmas time scaring the living crap out of children.

Timmy: How does Santa Claus get around so quickly with all those cookies in his tummy?

Mom: You’d be fast too if the police kept trying to track you down for breaking and entering.

by Inferior April 22, 2020

Black Santa Claus

Unless he went back to the South pole, there's already been a Black Santa Claus before now, and it hasn't been remarkable news. Black Santa Claus was the Santa Claus that got shit done a few years ago, but with the Derek Chauvin versus George Floyd and similar incidents, Black Santa Claus might have said Fuck Christmas Nobody Acted Right last year (2020). By now Black Jesus and Black Santa Claus aren't new, 50 years ago their existence might have been shocking some people.

Black Santa Claus made it to TV a few years ago, but it seemed like people forgot about Christmas and any version of Santa Claus last year. Lotsf Cristians who celebrate Christmas are black, so t would only make sense that the one bringing them presents was Black Santa Claus. It would make more sense for Black Jesus to be the one to save their soul, not a guy that looks like the one that kneeled on their neck for almost 10 minutes. That guy looks more like the antichrist to them than Jesus.

by The Original Agahnim December 11, 2021

Santa Claus

The old man in red who breaks in, points to you, then your mum and your dad, then says "Hoe hoe hoe"

Kid: Santa Claus is so mean
Santa: Hoe

by da_savage_hacker January 4, 2020

Chinese Santa Claus

When you test positive for COVID-19, so you wait until nighttime and go house to house, sneezing into everyone's air conditioners. Despite the name, this is most effective in the summertime.

Looks like I caught the rona, time to pull a Chinese Santa Claus!

by lerogers7 December 9, 2020

'Zat You, Santa Claus?

A song by Louis Armstrong

'Zat You, Santa Claus?
Sure is dark out, ain't the slightest spark out
'Pon my slackened jaw!
Who's there? Who is it stopping for a visit?
'Zat You, Santa Claus?

by SPrice1980 May 7, 2023