A mysterious creature whose sightings have grown more frequent in the early 2010s. Eyewitnesses claim that The Donald (as it is commonly known) is short, fat, has a head of hideous red hair, and speaks in loud, obnoxious gibberish. The Donald is said to be native to New York, but according to cryptozoologists is more likely to be from Texas (this may explain the infamous Chupacabra).
The Donald is difficult to glimpse in the wild, but it is much easier to come across its various minions, who imitate its call. They are likely to be found in the Southern and Southwestern United States, and are recognizable by their distinctive calls of "DER GUNNA TAKE MAH GUNS!" and "F**K MEXICANS!" Occasionally, many hundreds of these minions will gather together in massive swarms, and even more rarely The Donald itself will appear in these swarms. No human has ever observed one of these and lived to tell the tale, but it is speculated that they are some sort of mating ritual during which The Donald somehow reproduces.
The Donald is believed to be very dangerous, and those entering its territory are advised to not do anything that could irritate it.
The Donald is difficult to glimpse in the wild, but it is much easier to come across its various minions, who imitate its call. They are likely to be found in the Southern and Southwestern United States, and are recognizable by their distinctive calls of "DER GUNNA TAKE MAH GUNS!" and "F**K MEXICANS!" Occasionally, many hundreds of these minions will gather together in massive swarms, and even more rarely The Donald itself will appear in these swarms. No human has ever observed one of these and lived to tell the tale, but it is speculated that they are some sort of mating ritual during which The Donald somehow reproduces.
The Donald is believed to be very dangerous, and those entering its territory are advised to not do anything that could irritate it.
LOCAL MAN CLAIMS DONALD TRUMP SIGHTING!
This Friday on the Discovery Channel. . . The Search for Donald Trump!
This Friday on the Discovery Channel. . . The Search for Donald Trump!
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Concentration camp, prison, or orphanage (and not the nice sort of orphanage... or prison... or concentration camp).
Concentration camp, prison, or orphanage (and not the nice sort of orphanage... or prison... or concentration camp).
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