Emergency Wank

Usually in a very stressful, indecisive situation one will decide to go have wank before making any vital decisions.
*Right before an exam*
Yo, Vlad, where are you going?
I am gonna go quickly to the bathroom!
To do what?
*whispers* To have an emergency wank, I cannot think straight, I need to let some steam off!
Alright, go ahead!
by wanking May 11, 2017
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skinny wank

receiving oral from a skinny woman
Hey Billy, did ya get a gud spunkin from the skinny wank ye fuckin lad?
by spunkatom March 25, 2016
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Ruby wank

"Just had a quick ruby wank, made a right mess"
by Beezus37 October 01, 2017
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wank water

Be careful not to ruin your bath with wank water.
by knobend1989 May 23, 2016
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dodgy wank

An additional level of risk to a 'Danger Wank'.

You do the same as a danger wank but have to watch some weird fucked up porn, so if they do catch you it's way worse.
"Dude I'm grounded for 6 months and have to go to therapy because I failed doing a dodgy wank"
by Mrs Pearley November 01, 2021
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Pokey chokey bum wank

To combine 2 sexual acts for one dose of heightened pleasure a pokey bum wank combined with self asphyxiation by the use of vigorously inserting ones finger in an out of one's own anus whilst furiously pleasuring ones own man truncheon with the other hand and at roughly a minute before the point of unbridled ecstasy lean forward on the pre attached belt (hung from the light fitting before the start of the act) choking one's self out and at the point of the act of cumming releasing the pressure on the belt giving you the pleasure of a good pokey and a good bit of asphyxiation admittedly it is a lot of effort but after a few goes it gets easier to set up ideally a spare bedroom is available so you can just leave the equipment ready and waiting not for the feint of hearted and not recommended to do without letting someone know what you have planned (maybe phone up one of your parents and ask if they could stay on the line to make sure release was in good time if a bit late they can phone the relevant emergency service)
I really enjoy a good pokey chokey bum wank but I love a bit of asphyxiation sex too if only there was a way I could enjoy both at the same time (idea form's) just maybe there is a way it might take some time and effort but just think of the pleasure maybe just maybe it might be worth a bit of experimentation to see what is the worst that can happen
(any attempt to do this is at one's own risk and no amount of expensive no cash up front lawyers can help to sue until a safety bracket can be set up maybe one for some entrepreneurs to try pitch to the dragons den)
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can't-wank-erous

Frustration or irritability resulting from the inability to masturbate on account of a lack of privacy or opportunity.
Frank had relatives in town and was growing increasingly can't-wank-erous.
by ladydady October 22, 2015
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