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Nature's Bidet

a naturally occurring spring or geyser one uses to bathe the genital and perineal areas of the body
Unhappy Camper: I forgot my toilet paper when I came to camp at Yellowstone and now i have to poop but there's only cacti to relieve the poo from my bottom. What should I do?

Local: Well you should use Nature's Bidet. Go poop on that mound over there and don't get up until 35 or 120 minutes have passed.
by Keeton1229 September 25, 2011
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Hillbilly Bidet

Sometimes when you take a crap at home, you realize one of two things; 1: there is no toilet paper to be found and no one to get it for you or 2: your crap was so disgusting that toilet paper will be no match for it at all. A "Hillbilly Bidet" is when you forsake the use of toilet paper altogether, get up off the toilet and proceed straight to the shower to clean yourself off.
Dude, I got such ridiculous food poisoning that I didn't even attempt to wipe...just went straight to the shower for a hillbilly bidet.
by Poop Geyser June 28, 2011
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Swedish Bidet

A swedish bedit is when the sewers overflow with such force that whomever is sitting on the toilet get a stream of sewer water up their behind. This is of course a refrence too the swedish immegration situation.
My brother got too experience a swedish Bidet when my dad opened up the sewer connection.
by Haldoe November 15, 2023
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Chocolate bidet

When Rhett and link became a chocolate fountain, and the liquid chocolate went up links ass, then Rhett proceeded to get down on his knees and open his mouth for links gooey goodness
“It’s like a bidet that does exactly the opposite of what it should do, which is called a badonk or a chocolate bidet”
by Yung_sexc_muthafuka December 30, 2021
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Redneck bidet

When you are in the act and a dog come up from behind and licks your ass
The dog gave me a redneck bidet while I was going down on my girlfriend
by It's average sized August 3, 2024
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Ghetto bidet

when your taking a big shit, and it hits the toilet water and then, the water splashes your a-hole. (Just like a kid cannonballing into the pool)
Dude I just gave myself a ghetto bidet
by _cpek December 8, 2017
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Muddy Bidet

When you drop a fast heavy deuce and the toilet water splashes up into your ass crack.
I was so glad I found a clean restroom but the muddy bidet ruined it for me.
by Toooldforthis July 27, 2022
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