excuses are like asses

A comparison of excuses to asses.

"Excuses are like asses, full of shit"
OR
"Excuses are like asses, full of holes"

by R@ndomProf@nity May 22, 2004

excuses are like asses

Indicates the prevelance or abundance of a thing. Adds a negative connotation to what every you are comparing to assholes. Usually used as "blanks" are like asshole, everyone's got one.

Mustangs are like assholes, every one has one.

by tex May 24, 2004

excuserise

to think of an excuse and the answer to any question which may arise from that excuse.
basically, making sure you're excuse is a full and matching outfit. not an evening dress with a backpack you grabbed at the last minute.

'so you ready for college today?'
'yeah...i've just got to excuserise before Psych hand in'

by deathdrop April 20, 2007

excusex

To have an excuse to sex.

Emily gave me a reason to excusex.

by Juicy James April 23, 2008

Excuseplaination

An explanation which is simultaneously being used as an alibi, which although it is valid was not necessary to say as an explanation for any reason other than as an excuse.

"That's a crappy excuseplaination bro."

by BradicalMcLoone July 24, 2011

Excuse Cloud

To give a reason against something which isn't the actual reason one is against it.

An example of excuse clouding is easily seen in terms of a fictitious conversation:

Jack: "Want to go to the movies?"

Jill: "I don't have any money." (When in reality she just doesn't want to go see that movie).

Jack: "I'll pay for you."

Jill: Some other argument other than just saying she doesn't want to see that movie.

by creideiki333 November 12, 2011

excuses.txt

In some competitive online games (such as Quake III), used to be a snarky remark addressed to opponents who would keep coming up with explanations as to why they lost a round, insinuating that the explanation provided was just a made-up excuse picked from an imaginary text file filled with random excuses (i.e. `excuses.txt`).

Ultimately, some players turned this proverbial `excuses.txt`into reality by implementing a script that would automatically pick a random line from such a file on disk, and send it to their opponent as a chat message whenever the player was fragged in the game.

(A loses, B wins the round.)

A: No fair, my mouse ran off the pad!
B: Yeah, sure... excuses.txt.

by AduAsz April 9, 2017