G.I. butt wipe

During World wars I and II,American foot soldiers were only issued about 10 individual squares of toilet paper to keep backpack weight and volume to a minimum.If a soldier needed to wipe his butt,he would take one square of toilet paper and fold it into quarters. He would then tear out a semicircular portion from the common corner which left a hole in the middle of the paper when unfolded.He would then stick his forefinger through the hole and wipe his ass with the protruding finger. The paper was grasped at the base of the finger with the free hand while the soiled finger was slowly pulled free of the paper.The contaminated square was then discarded and the corner previously removed was used to clean from under the fingernail.

When the toilet paper roll starts getting low,I will generally implement the G.I. butt wipe procedure.

by wolfbait51 June 1, 2011

wired

1. Displaying or feeling or stating things that would lead others to believe you are overly stimulated or hyperactive due to the influence of sugar, caffeine, or other substances such as amphetamines

2. Extremely excited about something.

3. Connected to the Internet.

1) That extra cup of coffee has me so wired I'm going to stay up all night writing Urban Dictionary entries!

2) I'm wired about getting wired to the Dark Web!

by Richard Allan Cooper August 4, 2016

Hyper wiper

An individual who wipes after deficating in an excessive and compulsive manner. Stems from an episode of The Tyra Show.

Annie wipes til there's nothing left on the toilet paper; what a hyper wiper!!!

by The voltaginator September 5, 2009

one wipe shit

A bowl movement that only requires one wiping of toilet paper to remove all of the poop residue from one's anus. A one wipe shit usually falls out of the anus at a high velocity and has a very solid, low liquid form; yet, it produces no splash back from the toilet bowl water.

I ate so much fiber that my poop dropped out of my anus and barely left any residue, requiring only one wipe to clean my butt hole. I wish that all of my daily shits were one wipe shits so that I could save money on toilet paper.

Mentioned on the Adam Carolla Podcast 8-11-11

by pzeke August 14, 2011

The Wired

Another term for the world wide web; the internet.

Did you find anything interesting on The Wired today?

by M3tb October 8, 2008

safety wipe

A safety wipe is the one you give yourself after a fart that may have been wet and resulted in you accidentally pooping yourself a little.

Joe: I farted earlier and I had to do a safety wipe.

Kevin: ( wet sounding fart)
Sam: Damn, you need to go do a safety wipe

by Captain Caveman III October 7, 2009

go wipe

1) Don't be a pussy.

2) Eat shit.

Bill: "I don't think I can drink tonight, my flight instructor is picking me up at 6 AM."

Me: "Oh wow ho, GO WIPE."

by Tyler December 7, 2004