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an ultimate cunt who should be liquidised into thalidomide wank oil and festering decomposed spunk
((wank spanners basatoradorial fuck custard) a third dan black belt shit house and fuck custard who should be stir fried in hot synthetic Kentucky fried dog shit after being arse fucked by a bisexual octopus, while his balls are steamed cleaned in hot camels piss. a), a mark five cunt with power steering and overdrive.
by bucket crutch 2 April 20, 2022
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Butt Naked Wank

When you have the house all to yourself and crank the hog totally butt ass naked
Cuh u haven’t had a butt naked wank??? Ur missing out
by Milf Hunter Jit November 16, 2023
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Swedish Crab Wank

When someone is wanking off or getting wanked off by someone else and their foreskin rips off while doing so.
Megan: “I gave him a Swedish Crab Wank
by RicoIsNonce August 25, 2023
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Plank Wank

Where you stay as still as a statue but you have a wank
You wouldn’t believe what I just did. I had a plank wank
by Pete-the-pedo July 24, 2025
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Peterborough wank

A Peterborough wank is when a male jerks off with a condom on which is usually followed with a gap sound
I heard Shay doing a Peterborough wank last night
by Oopie goopie III July 6, 2025
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Trouser wank

When a girl or guy feels up a guys dick through is trousers
How far have you gone?”
“I gave Jack a trouser wank
by Penis_nose August 26, 2019
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big telly pokey bum wank

The insertion of your finger or object into your rectum whilst masturbating / jerking off, to increase pleasure while watching pornography or sexually stimulating broadcast material to enhance the experience, either on television or vvia internet streaming on computer, smartphone or tablet.
He was so aroused by the two lesbians performing cullingus on each other on late-night television, he couldn't resist giving himself a big telly pokey bum wank.
by Mackem Beefy September 19, 2021
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