External Penile Fixation

A condition where one is so fucking obsessed with making comments and/or jokes relating to size of their friends penis (which they've never actually seen) until all they can think of is creating new jokes and staying up late at night on Urban Dictionary to create new jokes relating to that friends penis. Currently a cure has not been found, but rumor has it a good dose of maturity might be the trick

Kyle: Dude, why does Aki always talk about DJ's dick all the time?

Brandon: Hmm, I don't know. Probably external penile fixation...or he's gay. either way it's fucking weird.

by Disc Jockey October 14, 2009

United Penile Service

Employer of all Malemen, who seeks to deliver males to other men worldwide.

Roberto- Hey, Jimmy, I wanna work for the United Penile Service and become a maleman

Jimmy- Wait, doesn't that mean you'll deliver men to other guys?!

Roberto- Yes, it most certainly does

Jimmy- Then I must be your first customer!

Roberto- Thank you sweety, let me give you an orguysm

Jimmy- yay i get to be your buttstove

by Father EEP January 18, 2008

inter departmental penile implant

when your boss is transferred to another department, and the replacement is some hack you used to have seniority over, hence making your job a living hell.

i ca'nt believe they made that choad eater my boss. he does'nt know his head from a hole in the ground. i sure as hell wo'nt listen to that inter departmental penile implant. what a bunch of cocksmunch's!

by freedav05 January 9, 2007

penile attention deficit disorder (padd)

A penis that has a short attention span that deflates before business is fully conducted.

When asked for an explanation from his wife as to why he didn't complete the sex act, the husband replied "I've been diagnosed with penile attention deficit disorder (PADD)."

by Xander913 January 7, 2014

penile grease

The white slimy substance that is ejaculated out of the male genitalia at the point of climax, whether alone or with a partner.

“Im gonna spread my penile grease on your face”

by Funkfish February 21, 2018

Penil Contortion

When the penis contorts and has somewhat of a seizure. Sometimes the penis will tie a knot in itself during this. Usually caused by too much ejaculation.

I had penil contortion last night, my penurd spit out green juice.

by RoxeeKodone June 30, 2021

Penile Denial

When a man with a little dick refuses to accept the reality that his dick is not large

Man: “girl Imma make you scream tonight”

Woman (or Man if he so chooses): “Boy?!? With that little thing.... you must have Penile Denial”

by This is not pudding May 24, 2020