half-hour clock technique

noun: a clock-watching form of procrastination, in which the procrastinator schedules the "start time" of a dreaded task based on the next "half-hour" mark of the clock. For example, if the clock reads "1:35", a procrastinator employing the half-hour clock technique will start the task when the clock strikes "2:00", usually filling in this time gap with activities such as web surfing and masturbation. The technique is popular amongst perfectionists, numerologists, the obsessive compulsive and unemployed spectrum of procrastinators.

Hey, it's 4:47. Did you finish writing that cover letter?

Actually I did not. I was waiting till 5:00 to start. I'm using the half-hour clock technique.

by 77jim April 8, 2011

Five Point Exploding Ass Technique

Derived from the Five Point Exploding Heart Technique used at the end of Kill Bill 2. Used to refer to a bowel movement that sprays rather unpleasantly into the toilet, leaving an aweful mess to clean up. Frequently encountered the morning after a night of heavy drinking which was followed by a suspicious curry.

Argh, I had the most horrific Five Point Exploding Ass Technique this morning! Damn that curry!

by Oofnun September 1, 2010

1-2-3-4 Study Technique

1. Drink an energy drink, preferably something strong like NOS
2. Look through your notes as fast as you can, regardless of if you can actually read it or understand it.
3. Bust a Nut (tm).
4. Take a nap.

Repeat steps 3 and 4 as necessary.

Also known as the 3-4-3

"Have you heard of the 1-2-3-4 Study Technique?"
"Yeah dude, in fact, I'm going to do a 3-4-3 right now before my chemistry test!"
"Awesome!"

by Erik Ward October 3, 2007

Recovery Position - Jessica Ankle Cross Technique

When rolling an unconscious person from their back into the side recovery positions, raise their near-side knee up and cross that ankle over the opposite leg - this simple ankle cross will make the person roll over easily and could safe their life by preventing aspiration of vomit. This is called the Jessica Ankle Cross Technique named after the medical doctor who demonstrated it.

He's really big, if you don't use the Recovery Position - Jessica Ankle Cross technique you'll never be able to roll him into the Recovery Position after be became unconscious.

by First Aid Skills and Whatnot March 10, 2020

Ice Technique

First, you take 4 ice cubes. For a male, you would first shove one up your ass then put two on your testicles, then put one on your "tip" then let it all melt.

For females, take one ice cube then shove it up your ass, then put 2 in your vagina, then finally shove one down your throat.

Wanna see me perform my ice technique? *epicly takes out 4 ice cubes*

by Xxboomer4daysxX July 24, 2020

Octopus Technique

The tactical use of a smoke grenade to escape a potentially hazardous situation in Call of Duty, in which one senses danger, throws his or her smoke grenade, promptly yells, "OCTOPUS TECHNIQUE!" at the top of his or her lungs and runs away.

Player 1: HAHA! I've got you now {Player 2}!

Player 2: EGADS! {Player 1} has me in their sights! (Throws down smoke grenade) OOOOCTOPUS TECHNIQUE!!!!!!!!!!! ({Player 2} runs away)

by {Player 2} April 3, 2010

The Kaya-Technique

A way to decide if a game reviewer actually takes time to play the game/plays the game they are reviewing. Here's an example:

1. Take the game called Shadow of War, it was a pretty famous triple A game but there was a lot of controversy surrounding it because of its microtransactions. Big reviewers that don't really care about gaming and don't review gamers properly (like Jim Sterling and Paragon) said the game was pay to win, even though it wasn't.

2. Find a reviewer you'd like to know if they are legit.

3. Watch their Shadow of War review

4. What did they say about the micro-transactions? In this example, you know that shadow of war isn't pay to win.

5. If they said it is pay to win, they obviously don't actually pay much attention to the game/ they never played the game and just copy and paste mix what other reviewers have said.

This is an easy and quick way to know if a reviewer is legit. It works with any game and any part or controversy surrounding it, the only two rules are:

1. This only works if you have played the game you're using this technique with and know what is wrong and what it is right.

2. The wrong side is the more famous and believed side by the community.

1: Hey, I found this new youtube channel called Jim Sterling, he is fucking amazing at reviewing games.

2: Dude, have you even tried The Kaya-Technique? He said that Battlefront 2 still is pay to win even though they removed microtransactions a while ago.

by mystique777 May 27, 2018