noun: person: A Jerk-off Jehova Witness is somebody who only texts or calls you when he's jerking off, and doesn't ever want to actually meet. He is annoying and comes a-knocking at the times that are convenient only to them.
Mike only ever calls me when he's jerking off. I offer to make plans so we can both get off, but something always comes up. He's such a jerk-off jehova. aka. a Jerk-Off Jehova Witness
by R. Tizz-E April 9, 2024
Get the A Jerk-Off Jehova Witnessmug. A variation of "Joe Schmoe", this term is used for someone who inserts their opinion when not asked. Additionally, this person thinks they know what they're talking about, even though they have no experience or knowledge on most subject being discussed. You might say a Joe Jerk Off is a member of the Peanut Gallery.
Guy #1: Do you hear this guy talking about shit he knows nothing about?
Guy #2: Yeah, he's a real Joe Jerk Off
Guy #2: Yeah, he's a real Joe Jerk Off
by ImAGorilla69 March 16, 2022
Get the Joe Jerk Offmug. “Jerking off on a pile of sand” is a metaphor used to describe the poor planning and execution of the withdrawal from Afghanistan under Joe Biden‘s administration. Not only leaving US military equipment and creating civil unrest in already unstable country, and then after all that they don’t even trying to help civilians find refuge in neighboring country’s. Although Afghanistan is an Islamic Republic, someone argue it’s more of a dictatorship.
Tim “Hey Bill did you see the news”
Bill “Yeah man”
Tim “jerking off on a pile of sand”
Bill “Well shit, we could go there and get a blackhawk helicopter with a 50% discount”
Tim “I Already booked tickets”
Bill “Yeah man”
Tim “jerking off on a pile of sand”
Bill “Well shit, we could go there and get a blackhawk helicopter with a 50% discount”
Tim “I Already booked tickets”
by Big man 1776 October 16, 2022
Get the Jerking off on a pile of sandmug. On June 9th, all pedos must go into a local pre school. and jizz on all of the kids telling them it's "milk"
"Yo, what are you doing for pedo jerk off day?" "I am hitting up my daughters schools for real." "bet, can I pull up"
by Ihearttaylor February 24, 2025
Get the Pedo jerk off daymug. by Eggg1031 April 1, 2024
Get the jerk off in someonemug. A figurative description of an attitude towards life, as well as your immediate and distant surroundings. When you refer to yourself or someone else 'just Jerking off and smoking Newports',, you are simply trying to convey that you/they are not letting anything current issue take their mind off themselves. It is the most self-absorbed and least constructive activity imaginable.
Once I get my pension, I am just gonna retreat to my apartment in Des Moines, and then I'm just gonna jerk off and smoke Newports until Yellowstone does us all in, THAT's my 5-year plan!
I tried to pursuade him to get more involved in student politics, but he just sits in his room jerking off and smoking Newports like these things don't affect him!
I tried to pursuade him to get more involved in student politics, but he just sits in his room jerking off and smoking Newports like these things don't affect him!
by how-young-people-talk March 31, 2020
Get the Jerk off and smoke Newportsmug.