Crunchy g

N.: Environmentally conscious person who is serious about leading a healthy, natural lifestyle. Crunchy as opposed to chewy ( as in granola bars ) due to high level of commitment to reducing environmental footprint even if that means sacrificing enjoyment or taste.

Adj.: having the characteristics of a crunchy g

Man, Laurie and Larry sure went all Crunchy G after moving to Portland.

by Childe Harolde February 02, 2012

crunchy asshole

A nasty and abnormally crisp anus as a result of a variety of things (toilet paper, shit, hair, etc.). Use "crunchy asshole" when fuck just won't cut it.

You fucking crunchy asshole.
That shit's nastier than a crunchy asshole.
This is fucking worse than eating out a crunchy asshole.

by angryelephant March 06, 2019

Crunchy Pudding

When you’re eating someone’s ass and they’ve got shit in their asscrack

Johnny: I tried to eat Rebecca’s ass last night but she had crunchy pudding

by gay_eatpu$$ March 20, 2019

Crunchy poptart

An unwashed, dry, semen caked-up vagina.

After a long night at the gangbang, her crunchy poptart gave my penis road rash.

by DirtyDenimDawn March 05, 2018

cow-crunchy

n. An old, dried cow-pie. Often used in exclamations.

Holy cow-crunchies!

by Cattle March 12, 2003

Crunchy Mike

not smooth, not dirty, NOT silky. Just fuckin CRUNCHY.

Crunchy Mike is the one sketchball that you see walkin around the run down porn stores in yo hood.

by Ciggie Bone April 25, 2009

Crunchy Mom

Crunchy mom is the new term for a modern day Karen. Crunchy moms let their kids eat rocks and dirt and ignore any form of science. They use the term crunchy as a way to justify shaming other mothers who don’t do things that they like such as formula feeding or caring about safe sleep.

Did you hear about Alice? She’s “ crunchy “she said I can let my kid eat rocks because it’s good for him!! She definitely didn’t get a medical degree from google.

Crunchy mom: a mom who is a bitch

by omgsocrunchy November 02, 2021