A "college help forum" that breeds elite nerd factions. Everyone wants to know their "chances" of getting into a certain Ivy school, but everyone knows that if you don't have an inspiring life story you can't get in in the first place.
Another day at College Confidential...
Thread title: Chances
iluvphysics: Hey everyone, I want to know my chances of getting into the University of Chicago. Someone please tell me if these are remotely good enough?
Caucasian male, 5.1 GPA Freshman year
5.2 GPA Sophomore year
5.5 GPA Junior year
(weighted with extra summer classes)
2400 on the SAT, 36 on the ACT (re-took them 6 times)
President of Debate Club, French NHS, Science NHS, National Honor Society, Class Vice President, Treasurer for Spanish NHS, Art NHS,
Member of almost every club at school
Did Basketball, Tennis, and Track all four years, winning excessive awards and breaking more records than I have fingers,
Worked 3 jobs and was promoted my Senior year to leadership positions in all of them,
Recieved the Governor's Teen Award
Mayor's Top 10 award
National Merit Scholar
And numerous other academic awards,
Did 5000+ hours of community service,
Won the National Physics Bowl championship 4 years in a row
So will somebody PLEASE tell me if I have the FAINTEST chance of MAYBE getting in?
gradezarecool: I think you have a very strong chance of getting in, just like me.
mathdude101: And me!
SocratesSquared: Me, too. We'll all get in.
Thread title: Chances
chucknorris51: Hey guys, I want to get into the University of Chicago. Can someone help me out?
White dude from Colorado,
3.85 GPA Freshman year
3.65 GPA Sophomore year
4.06 GPA Junior year
(all weighted)
Did 70 hours of community service
Played tennis on JV for 3 years
Member of Gaming Club, French NHS, Science NHS
Got a 30 on my ACT
Worked a paper route for 4 years
Thanks
gradezarecool: YOU HAVE NO AWARDS?? No chance of getting in. You need at least a 36 on the ACT to even qualify.
mathdude101: OMG, ARE YOU KIDDING ME?? Not a chance. How could you even think of qualifying?
SocratesSquared: Wow, you're really stupid.
chucknorris51: Well, I did survive arm cancer when I was 4 years old and have been recovering all my life, even learning to play the guitar and tennis. What sets you guys apart?
gradezarecool: My extracurriculars.
mathdude101: My extracurriculars.
SocratesSquared: My extracurriculars.
chucknorris51: I see. So you really think I have no chance?
gradezarecool: NO CHANCE!!
mathdude101: NO WAY!!
SocratesSquared: I HAVE A TINY PENIS!! I mean, NO WAY!!
chucknorris51: Hah. Retards.
Thread title: Chances
iluvphysics: Hey everyone, I want to know my chances of getting into the University of Chicago. Someone please tell me if these are remotely good enough?
Caucasian male, 5.1 GPA Freshman year
5.2 GPA Sophomore year
5.5 GPA Junior year
(weighted with extra summer classes)
2400 on the SAT, 36 on the ACT (re-took them 6 times)
President of Debate Club, French NHS, Science NHS, National Honor Society, Class Vice President, Treasurer for Spanish NHS, Art NHS,
Member of almost every club at school
Did Basketball, Tennis, and Track all four years, winning excessive awards and breaking more records than I have fingers,
Worked 3 jobs and was promoted my Senior year to leadership positions in all of them,
Recieved the Governor's Teen Award
Mayor's Top 10 award
National Merit Scholar
And numerous other academic awards,
Did 5000+ hours of community service,
Won the National Physics Bowl championship 4 years in a row
So will somebody PLEASE tell me if I have the FAINTEST chance of MAYBE getting in?
gradezarecool: I think you have a very strong chance of getting in, just like me.
mathdude101: And me!
SocratesSquared: Me, too. We'll all get in.
Thread title: Chances
chucknorris51: Hey guys, I want to get into the University of Chicago. Can someone help me out?
White dude from Colorado,
3.85 GPA Freshman year
3.65 GPA Sophomore year
4.06 GPA Junior year
(all weighted)
Did 70 hours of community service
Played tennis on JV for 3 years
Member of Gaming Club, French NHS, Science NHS
Got a 30 on my ACT
Worked a paper route for 4 years
Thanks
gradezarecool: YOU HAVE NO AWARDS?? No chance of getting in. You need at least a 36 on the ACT to even qualify.
mathdude101: OMG, ARE YOU KIDDING ME?? Not a chance. How could you even think of qualifying?
SocratesSquared: Wow, you're really stupid.
chucknorris51: Well, I did survive arm cancer when I was 4 years old and have been recovering all my life, even learning to play the guitar and tennis. What sets you guys apart?
gradezarecool: My extracurriculars.
mathdude101: My extracurriculars.
SocratesSquared: My extracurriculars.
chucknorris51: I see. So you really think I have no chance?
gradezarecool: NO CHANCE!!
mathdude101: NO WAY!!
SocratesSquared: I HAVE A TINY PENIS!! I mean, NO WAY!!
chucknorris51: Hah. Retards.
by SPDR January 5, 2009
Get the College Confidential mug.a smart ass statement that lets the recipient know that you do not give a shit about their future. They do not have the right temperment for the trade, and you have made the decision to terminate them.
Morgan, you're out of here. What the fuck are you talkin about? You don't have the right temperment for the trade. What the fuck am I supposed to do? Theres always barber college.
by captain poopypants November 19, 2004
Get the there's always barber college mug.Related Words
The perfect balance of neighbourhood school and elite school. Strong meme culture, most people ain't toxic but when there are toxic people, oh boy. Somehow, a large LGBT and independent artist population. Somewhat balanced (staff and students alike) racial background ratio.
Students of this institution (called 'TJCians') are university bound pupils fuelled with Passion, Purpose, Drive, Integrity and Compassion, the school's values. TJCians are generally more relaxed, but will have 'sad boi hours' nearing examinations, however still manage to promote to the next year anyways.
For College For Nation.
Located at 22 Bedok South Road, Singapore.
Students of this institution (called 'TJCians') are university bound pupils fuelled with Passion, Purpose, Drive, Integrity and Compassion, the school's values. TJCians are generally more relaxed, but will have 'sad boi hours' nearing examinations, however still manage to promote to the next year anyways.
For College For Nation.
Located at 22 Bedok South Road, Singapore.
Karen: "Talk to me like you're an idiot!"
Me: "I'm sending our future child to Temasek Junior College"
Karen: "Perfect!"
Me: "I'm sending our future child to Temasek Junior College"
Karen: "Perfect!"
by FailingChemUnderSuresh March 6, 2019
Get the Temasek Junior College mug.The Ithaca College School of Music is comprised half of ridiculous talent and half of compete insanity.
Pretty much every faculty member is an urban legend and a ridiculous virtuoso. The faculty includes, but is not limited to: John "tavakididama" White, Pablo "The Most Interesting Man in the World" Cohen, Bradley "Sass" Hougham, David "Eroica Dynamite" Pacun, Frank "Keep It in the Family" Campos, Dave "The Wizard" Unland, Ed "Pianoforte" Swenson, Mark "Look at my pecs" Radice, Jeffrey "Hector Berlioz" Meyer, John "He's not so much a pianist as he is a state of mind" Stetch, etc.
The music school intentionally removed all of the vending machines some years ago because they realized their students would not leave the building otherwise.
The school of music is at its classiest during its annual Christmas concert, "Ford Fest." On this special day, the practice rooms transform into an open bar and opium den.
All in all, a utopia of musicality.
PS- Josh "No Socks" Oxford.
Pretty much every faculty member is an urban legend and a ridiculous virtuoso. The faculty includes, but is not limited to: John "tavakididama" White, Pablo "The Most Interesting Man in the World" Cohen, Bradley "Sass" Hougham, David "Eroica Dynamite" Pacun, Frank "Keep It in the Family" Campos, Dave "The Wizard" Unland, Ed "Pianoforte" Swenson, Mark "Look at my pecs" Radice, Jeffrey "Hector Berlioz" Meyer, John "He's not so much a pianist as he is a state of mind" Stetch, etc.
The music school intentionally removed all of the vending machines some years ago because they realized their students would not leave the building otherwise.
The school of music is at its classiest during its annual Christmas concert, "Ford Fest." On this special day, the practice rooms transform into an open bar and opium den.
All in all, a utopia of musicality.
PS- Josh "No Socks" Oxford.
by gesualdo April 18, 2010
Get the Ithaca College School of Music mug.A very small, very white, very catholic college in the ghettos of providence. 95% of students are carbon-copies of one another, not that that's a bad thing. they are generally attractive, white, upper middle class, moderately intelligent, with a super-human capacity for alcohol. fake ids are used more than school ids, and every day of the week has its designated drinking locale. oh, and also, there's a pretty decent basketball team.
Where do you go to school?
PC.
BC? Oh, that's a good school.
No, i said PC. Providence College.
Hmm, that's a good time up there, huh? (followed by winking, and nudging with elbow)
PC.
BC? Oh, that's a good school.
No, i said PC. Providence College.
Hmm, that's a good time up there, huh? (followed by winking, and nudging with elbow)
by preppyPCalum October 9, 2005
Get the providence college mug.Also known as Norwalk College of Champions, NCC is considered the Harvard of Community Colleges. Located in the beautiful foothills of the illuminous Connecticut town of Norwalk, NCC boasts an intense and rigorous curriculum that challenges its diverse and elite student body that endures a challenging and selective admissions process. Classes are usually followed by intense parties thrown at the houses of moms in neighboring Wilton, where anyone 18 to 87 is invited. Bro rape is a mandatory. Students major in store managing, filing, copying documents, and being someone's bitch in the office place. Students carry their experiences with them for the rest of their lives.
Norwalk Community College Student #1, "dude, this arithmetic is kicking my ass, maybe ill switch into filing, make a name for my self, you know?"
NCC Student #2, "brohan, you can totally follow your dreams at NCC, go for it, maybe one day, you can become the dude that gives stickers out at WalMart, or even maybe the cow at Stew Leondards."
NCC Student #1, "dude, you know you can't tempt me with my dream like that. i'll never become the cow"
Testimonial, "Well, at least I can piss away my parent's money at the College of Champions and learn how to use Microsoft Word."
NCC Student #2, "brohan, you can totally follow your dreams at NCC, go for it, maybe one day, you can become the dude that gives stickers out at WalMart, or even maybe the cow at Stew Leondards."
NCC Student #1, "dude, you know you can't tempt me with my dream like that. i'll never become the cow"
Testimonial, "Well, at least I can piss away my parent's money at the College of Champions and learn how to use Microsoft Word."
by TehKoloradoKID January 27, 2010
Get the Norwalk Community College mug.A Christian college in Grand Rapids, Michigan U.S.A. Known for its Jesus freaks, hot snobby bitches, and shitty investments. Has a 99% acceptance rate because they don't hesitate to financially rape someones' pockets for $35K a year. Doesn't have any real sports. 100% dry campus. If you fuck someone in the dorms, they will kick you out. About 90% of the student body is composed of social retards who go there because they grew up in sheltered, Jesus loving, god fearing communities and are attempting to add four more years to avoiding the real world. Most students graduate in over four years due to the schools' curriculum of required theology and other bullshit classes that real schools don't teach. The student body is about as ethnically diverse as Toronto, Ontario (roughly 70% white, 30% asian, and about six blacks). The asians generally stay with one another and avoid white people like they're going to put them in concentration camps. Most of the guys are skinny dickless choches. The very small number of athletically toned guys have no problem tearing through the poon like it's spring break. The girls are stuck up twats who use their religion as an excuse as to why they claim to be virgins. Every girl there will put-out for a guy if his family is rich. Everyone there will piss themselves at the notion of atheists and other non-christian people. Best way to get someone to jerk off in front of you is to start talking about Jesus.
Normal college student: "So what did you do this weekend?"
Calvin college student: "I went to chapel and praised Jesus by the seminary pond. How about you?"
Normal college student: "I went to a party and got shitfaced then proceeded to show my genitalia to everyone and ended up waking up in a bed with two women and a pool of vomit next to me. It was about the usual."
Calvin college student: "You're going to hell."
Random Christian: "Excuse me, do you have a moment to talk about Jesus Christ?"
Calvin student: unzips pants
"I'm so sexually frustrated, I'm about to stick my dick in a light socket."
"My type of guy is one whose parents left him a six-figure trust fund."
Calvin college student: "I went to chapel and praised Jesus by the seminary pond. How about you?"
Normal college student: "I went to a party and got shitfaced then proceeded to show my genitalia to everyone and ended up waking up in a bed with two women and a pool of vomit next to me. It was about the usual."
Calvin college student: "You're going to hell."
Random Christian: "Excuse me, do you have a moment to talk about Jesus Christ?"
Calvin student: unzips pants
"I'm so sexually frustrated, I'm about to stick my dick in a light socket."
"My type of guy is one whose parents left him a six-figure trust fund."
by commandercrook October 17, 2013
Get the Calvin College mug.