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Turtle

The best pet you can have. Fuck dogs, fuck cats, fuck birds. They are the best. They are small and cute and they live 150 FUCKING YEARS so you dont need to worry about "He died because he was old". I have one called Miss Pauling and she's the best pet I had.
Girl:Do you have a pet?
Boy:Yes
Girl:Wich one?
Boy:A turtle
Girl:I want to suck your penis
by You care about this? May 26, 2018
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turtle

A more subtle name for herpes. The name of someone who studies turtles is a herpetologists. Therefore, herpe- in the name relates to a more subtle way to talk about herpes.
Seth: Dude, my condom broke while I was fucking Sarah.
Alex: Bro!! She's got the turtle!!
Seth: Oh Fuck!!
by Bassproman November 2, 2015
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Turtle Elitism

A strange phenomenon mostly native to Urban Dictionary where the top entries about Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles feel the need to bitch and whine about Power Rangers. It is parallel,but not entirely similar,to the way a medium handful of people from the old internet proclaimed cartoons to be superior to anime and hated anything animated in Japan,although Power Rangers is technically an adaptation of Super Sentai and not Japanese,however the parallels are still there. An additional thing to note is that the two series have both crossed over multiple times,be it in television or comic form,and as of writing the two are currently in franchise development hell or at least close to it.
EXAMPLE ONE:
Tommy: "I like Power Rangers."
Larry (while violently convulsing): "FUCK YOU POWER RANGER FANS FOR RUINING TMNT WITH YOUR SISSY ZORDS,THE TURTLES COULD KICK THE RANGER'S ASSES ANY DAY OF THE WEEK!"
Tommy: "Keep your Turtle Elitism to yourself,you old douchebag. Also,which rangers specifically?"
Larry: "FUCK!"

EXAMPLE TWO:
Frank: "I'm sick of seeing Turtle Elitism every time I look up the definition of the TMNT on Urban Dictionary."
Mari: "Why were you looking up the definition of TMNT on Urban Dictionary in the first place?"
Frank: "Boredom."
by Lazthedictionist July 31, 2024
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Squishy Turtled

When someone prints a squishy turtle on your Bambu 3d printer from the internally saved print files.
I got squishy turtled last night and realized I need better friends.
by Heinous Turtle Maker July 2, 2024
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turtle

Abbreviation of the "awkward turtle" hand gesture - expressed in one word. Turtle.

Awkward turtle is abbreviated to make it easier to define a situation. Or refer to turtles in the area.
mate: how was it meeting her parents?
boy: oh man... it was so bad. there were turtles everywhere.

boy: i totally had to watch this sex scene in a cinema with my parents.
mate: hahahahaha!

boy: a turtle walked past me and waved, saving "hi, my name's awkward"
by happycatsmiles December 15, 2010
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big brown turtle

The extremely satisfying defecation after a protracted bout of drinking & bad food
After all those shots & slices; the Big Brown Turtle reared his ugly head...
by SilentBob73 January 1, 2016
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turtle wash

verb; to cause pain.
used when you are going to do something bad to someone; funny way to scare someone and have them have no idea what you even mean.. until now
by L Pea-lunk November 28, 2009
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