Auto-not-at-all-erotic asphyxiation

The act of suffocating one's self with a waist belt in such a way so as to guarantee the complete lack of sexual arousal.

Stephen Colbert's Vasca line of pharmaceuticals, from Prescott Pharmaceuticals, is proud to introduce the Vasca Band. A belt that you place around your neck that constricts your esophagus to prevent finishing your entree and crushes your trachea so you can't order dessert.

Side effects of Vasca Band include: stoppedness of breath, facial bluing and auto-not-at-all-erotic asphyxiation.

by Anti-paradoxical May 18, 2011

Aspartame Arse

The BIG square fat bloated arse that dieting women have. Caused by the chemical sweetener in their diet croak drink that they are totally addicted to.

The methanol content of aspartame converts to formic acid and formaldehyde once inside their body, the formaldehyde then attaches to fat cells making it impossible for the body to burn off that fat. Result is the fat stays, the body gets fatter, it all ends up around the arse.

Bloke one: "Hey, have you seen the size of you're wifes back end?"
Bloke two "Yup, can't really miss that aspartame arse, she's on a diet".

by Alexis Robinson March 15, 2007

aspen

a nerdy gay guy

aspen is a nerd

he is also gay

by salty man June 19, 2019

Asperger's

Actually, in response to the above, Asperger's is not a psychiatric disorder, but a neurological one. There is emerging evidence of genetic predispositions and exciting research confirming the lack of mirror neurons (look it up) in this kind of brain. Brain scans of those who express Asperger's traits confirm verifiable deviations from those of neuro-typical people. The neurological differences manifest as difficulty reading and interpreting facial expressions and other forms of non-verbal communication; physical clumsiness (also neurological) and sometimes neurological differences present as a rigid, linear cognitive style. People with Asperger's usually have above average to superior IQ scores and sometimes possess an extraordinary fund of knowledge about a particular subject. People with Asperger's often find success as engineers and computer programmers due to their preference and skill with mechanical things and relative weak social skills.

There is no known treatment for Asperger's disoder however the most common secondary symptoms/co-morbid conditions anxiety and depression can be successfully treated and controlled in most people.

James was bullied in school because he was different "geeky" an did not recognize the taunts of his cruel classmates, often in the form of dirty looks, laughing at and other non-verbal abuses. This led to a series of maladaptive coping behaviors including school avoidance, anxiety, and depression. James had a part time job at Apple's genius bar where he was able to work among others with similar strengths.

By learning about Asperger's, learning social pragmatics and working with professionals who knew how to explain James' cognitive style, James went on to win the Nobel prize in mathematics after a distinguished career at MIT. ,

by BWB, MS February 29, 2008

Asparagus

Slang for marijuana.

"Blowin' on asparagus; The realest shit I ever smoked" - Young Jeezy, "Put On"

by bonkeykong May 13, 2008

asphalt hickey

A scar or road rash caused by crashing and breaking one's fall with one's face or neck.

i.e. crash on the road --> kissing asphalt --> asphalt hickey

I got a sweet asphalt hickey when I endoed during Critical Mass (not wearing my helmet, course).

Wise Confucius say: kiss too much asphalt, get asphalt hickey.

by Jordy M July 7, 2008

aspen downhill

When a chic is sitting between two guys jerking them off simultaneously, simulating a downhill skier!

Aspen downhill

by Bone Miller February 18, 2014