Computard

A computer user who's hella retarded and hasn't any idea what the hell they're doing with a computer. Someone who thinks a virus scanner will protect them from pop-ups and banner ads. Someone who deserves nothing more than a limited-rights account and no ability to install software themselves. If they need Flash or Acrobat Reader, they need to call IT instead of bothering downloading themselves. Viruses and trojans were written because these people deserve them.

Thea is such a computard; she spilled coffee in her laptop and screwed up the MBR on the desktop I let her use — she's such a roob!

by Joshwalla May 23, 2009

Computer Hangover

A computer hangover is the feeling you get when you've been on the computer or texting or watching a movie or playing video games all day. Depending on the person, it can also occur after a few hours or even thirty minutes. Computer hangovers almost never occur when accompanied by another person, either because of the desire to impress them or because you were engaged in another activity (e.g. talking, thinking, or...) instead of just spacing. The effects of a computer hangover can be achieved as well by spacing for a day, lying on the couch for five hours, but lets see you try that.

SYMPTOMS:
-- headaches
-- slight naseau (depending on the person)
-- dry taste in mouth
-- extreme dislike of sunlight
-- sudden attraction to couch
-- loss of will to do anything other than just lie there
-- hunger or thirst (seeing as to you haven't probably left the couch for a few hours)
-- loss of memory for most of that day
-- empty sleepiness

CURES:
-- a cool shower
-- a glass of cold water
-- more computer (WARNING: temporary! Your computer hangover will get worse afterwards.)
-- time, time time!
-- calling a friend to chat
-- reengaging your mind with something required like homework (WARNING: no media should be involved, or your computer hangover will not be helped at all!)
-- Going outside for a quick run/walk
-- Washing your face with a cold cloth
-- Changing your clothes, brushing your hair, doing new makeup, "freshening up"

A: Dang, I've got one sick comp hangover. geez, this sucks. Can you grab me some water?
B: Sure. Dude, you have such a Computer Hangover. (Brings A a glass of water). So, how 'bout that homework?
A: WHAT?
B: I told you earlier, you have homework.
A: Nooo! I can't think at all right now.
B: You really don't remember?
A: Nothing. Nilch. Nada.

by InsanityisSexy:) June 12, 2011

computer widow

Term used to refer to the spouse of a vidiot.

Computer Widow: Honey, stop playing WOW and cuddle with me.
Vidiot: Awww, come on. Just until I reach level 60.

by Katie-Ivan April 23, 2006

computer crackhead

A computer crack head is a person that spends an insane amount of time using the computer, being mentally seperated from the outside world.

People who play retarted online games for long periods of time.

Angela: Nick you've been on the computer for 8 hours straight. Go brush your teeth, and take a shower!

Nick: I'm not finished yet! I have to kill this dragon, and collect fairy dust.

Angela: Nick, your a computer crackhead.

by Cewt Pickle for a Nickle July 22, 2009

Computer

Are you fucking kidding me?

You're using a computer to look up the definition for computer? God damn it you suck!

by dollarbill3585 October 4, 2013

fixing the computer

Getting walked in on while viewing porn on the computer and whacking off.

The other night, Mike inadvertently walked in on his buddy fixing the computer. It was mad gross.

by Nacho Party July 31, 2006

computer science

The bane of my existence. Why did I ever decide to minor in computer science?? I wish I could invent a time machine and go back in time and intercept myself before I declared it as my minor. I would then proceed to kick my own ass.

Computer science raped my GPA

by Rat Bastard November 9, 2003