absolutely wanked

A term used to mean 'drunk' used accidentally as opposed to 'absolutely wankered' when someone is trying to describe their state of drunkness... whilst drunk.

"Ere Billy come up mine tonight pal, yeah?"
"Sos m8 absolutely wanked on pimms ygm lad"

by FuckinBlazeItM8 October 29, 2015

Wank

when a british person masterbates they call it a wank

"Alright im going to have a wank"

by bigfatwank July 17, 2022

public wanking

Someone who tries to secretly jack off in public

Gavin has proved public wanking is possible.

by TheLittleDickToucher March 6, 2017

sand wank

When a male pleasure's oneself by using sandpaper between their palms and member.

"Jimmy did a sand wank as she wanted to know what a 90 year old lady would feel like during sex"

by GollumBoy September 10, 2016

fruit wank

When you wankmasturbatewith a piece of fruit. A popular choice for this activity is the watermelon. People usually bore a whole into the fruit to create a makeshift pussy and then proceed to insert they're penis inside and pleasure themselves

Jane - "I have heard rumours that Johnny carved a hole in a melon and then Fucked it last week"

Mike - "yeah, he told me about it yesterday apparently it was the best fruit wank he's ever had"

by Fuckmegently August 31, 2015

Test Wank

The act of checking the captain is awake after having a skin full. Usually in a pub toilet.

The good lady wife says I'm on a promise and I've had 8 gins. I'm off for a test wank

by Paul A Radcliffe May 23, 2023

Crack Wank

Similar to a tit wank but instead the ass cheeks are used, with no petentration involved. Penis is vertical between the crack.

I did all the housework today just so my girlfriend would crack wank me

by Everydayimcrackwanking-shuffle May 24, 2011