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Slapping the Weasel with the Right One

The act of masturbating, typically with the use of one's right hand.
Simon: "Dude, Ofena's claiming that Malcolm took advantage of her!"

Fredrik: "What!?, but she was the one who was trotting her turkey all up on his jive! Damn! If he would have just gone home and been slapping the weasel with the right one this never would have happened."
by J. H. Grissom September 27, 2008
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Slapping The Clown

Johnny Was Caught "Slapping The Clown" Over Behind The Circus Tent Watching The Dancing Girls Through A Slit...
by Fast ED March 19, 2012
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Flap Slapping

A sexual act performed by lesbians. This action requires the women to lock arms while sitting up facing each other and pulling each other in and out simultaneously, slapping their vagina's together. This position was born in France during the French Revolution, a time when woman rights we're becoming a cause for concern. It is an official pain Olympic sport.
On the seventh day, God rested while watching two young women Flap Slapping on his behalf. God was aroused by this act of Flap Slapping
by Doctor Bozzknocker May 1, 2010
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Slapping the Cactus

(v). to slap the cactus, to be slapping the cactus, to have slapped the cactus.

A phrase used upon the realization that you are (or even within the act of) doing something worthy of a *facepalm* only it is worse. It is also the more exciting substitute for calling someone dumb, or stupid.
"Sarah was definitely slapped the cactus last night - she turned the stove on, forgot that she had, and proceeded to set her laundry down - thankfully she only singed her eyebrows when she tried to put the fire out with the contents of a suspicious water bottle that turned out to be full of vodka"

Sam: "Come on man, you HAVE to admit, Shelby is pretty hott"
Tim: "Dude, stop slapping the cactus - she looks like a mule"
by Sienna Shay October 3, 2010
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slapping the pappy

Grandpa took too much Viagra , but found instant relief by slapping the pappy.He was beating his richard like it owed him money.
by ballz itchy July 4, 2016
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rabbit slapping

When you're fucking a bitch and your balls slap the top of her pussy
Dude, i was rabbit slapping this bitch so hard she couldn't walk the next day
by mynameismarky November 17, 2013
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lowkey slapping

What you say about someone you haven't noticed is hot before.
*See's someone who is usually average but is looking hot today*
Me: "Damn! They're lowkey slapping!"
by iamlowkeyslapping June 2, 2018
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