Apple? Are you fucking kidding me? What kind of idiot do you have to be to search for something as basic and boring as an apple? "An apple a day keeps the doctor away"? More like "an apple a day keeps the excitement away". Apples are the ultimate symbol of mediocrity and conformity, the kind of thing that people eat when they're too lazy or too cheap to try something new.
And don't even get me started on the "health benefits" of apples. Sure, they might have some vitamins and fiber or whatever, but they're also loaded with sugar and carbs, which will rot your teeth and make you fat. Plus, have you ever heard of cyanide? Yeah, that's right, apples contain a toxic chemical that can kill you if you eat too many of them. So much for keeping the doctor away, huh?
But hey, if you're really into apples, then go ahead and eat them. Just don't expect me to be impressed. There are so many other exciting and delicious fruits out there - mangoes, pineapples, passion fruit, you name it. But no, you just had to search for fucking apples. Congratulations, you're officially the most boring person on the planet.
And don't even get me started on the "health benefits" of apples. Sure, they might have some vitamins and fiber or whatever, but they're also loaded with sugar and carbs, which will rot your teeth and make you fat. Plus, have you ever heard of cyanide? Yeah, that's right, apples contain a toxic chemical that can kill you if you eat too many of them. So much for keeping the doctor away, huh?
But hey, if you're really into apples, then go ahead and eat them. Just don't expect me to be impressed. There are so many other exciting and delicious fruits out there - mangoes, pineapples, passion fruit, you name it. But no, you just had to search for fucking apples. Congratulations, you're officially the most boring person on the planet.
Wow, look at this genius over here, searching for fucking apples like it's some kind of culinary masterpiece. Newsflash, buddy - an apple a day might keep the doctor away, but it won't do shit for your taste buds. Go ahead and enjoy your bland, boring fruit while the rest of us indulge in something actually delicious.
by ValuableDamage42 April 11, 2023
Get the Applemug. by Avocado And Caitie July 22, 2019
Get the APPLEmug. by Pokecrosser101 August 14, 2017
Get the applemug. Person 1: I shoved an apple up my ass yesterday
Person 2: *internally screams and kills themself*
Person 3: What has the world come to *cries like a chicken*
Person 2: *internally screams and kills themself*
Person 3: What has the world come to *cries like a chicken*
by She shit on my dick April 17, 2017
Get the applemug. by Someoneontheinternet820 January 14, 2021
Get the applemug. by BlazeTheSorcerer January 30, 2017
Get the Applemug. Someone who is ratard. A person so idiotic no words can describe them. They are usually the annoying friend at school or your sibling. They are just like an apple. Round,red and is nothing compared to an orange like yourself. They are stupid. They are mentally unstable to handle your greatness. They came fresh out of juvie. They are an apple. Destruction 1000. One of the worst and baddest ways to roast someone nothing else compares.
by I want him to be mine November 20, 2018
Get the Applemug.