Nickname for a biological mother who has done nothing but traumatize her children, then lose custody of said children, and choose drugs over everything and anything. Her idea of bonding is offering you to tag-along for a night of blowing bums and contracting STDs. She refuses to take accountability or apologize for selling her children for drugs, abandon them in strangers apartments, and every other fucked up thing she’s done.
Hey, who’s that?
That’s my biological mother, we call her the Crypt Keeper.
Like from Tales Of The Crypt?
Exactly, but crackhead version.
That’s my biological mother, we call her the Crypt Keeper.
Like from Tales Of The Crypt?
Exactly, but crackhead version.
by poisoned poet April 04, 2022
One who puts extreme effort to maintain or improve something that should by natural process die out.
Taken from the ridiculous effort needed to keep Giant Pandas alive in captivity despite clear evidence that the creatures are Evolutionarily Unfit For Survival.
Taken from the ridiculous effort needed to keep Giant Pandas alive in captivity despite clear evidence that the creatures are Evolutionarily Unfit For Survival.
Dwight: Did you hear about Jim and Pam, they're trying to work it out despite what she did in New York.
Oscar: Yeah, Jim is such a Panda Keeper, he should have let that relationship die a long time ago.
Oscar: Yeah, Jim is such a Panda Keeper, he should have let that relationship die a long time ago.
by PolleN112 June 02, 2022
see: Women Have All The Power. Too Bad They Don't Know It. by: Michael J. Lockwood :)
Guy: 'Damn that girl is a piece keeper, she just keeps me chasing her and never giving out anything."
Guy: 'Damn that girl is a piece keeper, she just keeps me chasing her and never giving out anything."
by gsquared11 August 26, 2010
The Devils Gate Keeper: This is the cross between constipation and sketchy food decisions. You are alerted to this phenomenon by gut wrenching twisting pain in your lower abdomen. The kind of pain that makes you want to curl up in a ball and die. This pain is usually associated with the explosive diarrhea which follows a long night of light beer and Taco Bell. The difference is once you finally crawl to the toilet because it hurts too much to stand, you are not greeted with violent relief. Instead the pain continues as you strain and push with the force to cause a brain hemorrhage until you are finally able to pop the cork of despair. Once this happens you almost die as you feel your soul exit your body via your ass.
So I’m a little bit dehydrated and had ten day old leftover chicken gumbo for lunch yesterday, which caused me to battle the devils gate keeper this morning.
by Pedro11111 April 11, 2019
One with the name Trey who has a list of betraying anyone he encounters by cutting off catalytic converters from your car when you leave it at Brian Hoars house assuming it's safe; so he can buy fentanyl with his cut
by Tommygun45 January 21, 2023
A french butter keeper is a term defined as the rectum of quadruple dwarf amputee former can-can dancer.
by Jacques DuBeur December 07, 2013
Good thing we had our hype keeper Joe for this party. The crowd was starting to fade away interest after zero sound or lasers.
by AdverageJoe_Earth August 23, 2017