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Somalian Driver’s License

A Somalian Driver’s License is when you take a hot steamy dump on the hood of a moving vehicle. As the car drives it will begin to smear all over the front windshield, obscuring the driver’s vision. If they don’t crash, they are granted a Somalian driver’s license.
My gf broke up with me, when she drives home today I’m gonna give her a Somalian Driver’s license.
by binladen-georgefloyd August 16, 2025
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loicense

Funny way of spelling license. Mostly used to parody britbongs
oi mate, u got a loicense for that spoon?
by Ryptun May 14, 2019
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Arse-hole Licence

If you are a known trouble maker and are regularly mean to people, you can obtain one of these so people can keep track of your unpleasant antics.
This was conceived when it became apparent that Ben Waller was too unpleasant to people, and it was deemed necessary to keep a tab on his bad behaviour by giving him 'Arse-hole points' every time he committed to being mean.
It is possible to remove points from your licence if you do kind and selfless acts, however, just like obesity, it's easier to gain that it is to lose.
Also similar to this is the 'Bitch licence', which works on the same principle but is given to females that deserve it.
Katie: Ben, you've been really mean today, I think you've been quite nasty to me!

Ben: Your face is nasty!

David: Ben, that's another point on your Arse-hole licence. That's four points you've got in the last 20 minutes bringing you to a grand total of nine.

Ben: Awww what?!
by ActiasLuna February 25, 2009
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Fartistic Licence

The art of creatively reshaping the true facts concerning a past release of Carbon Dibaxide
"Mr Darcy, I find it most difficult to credit your assertion that Miss bennet was responsible for the beefy eggo that cleared the dance floor not five minutes ago.. For one thin, the miasma concerned was distinctly reminiscent of the casserole I observed you yourself consuming last night, whereas I have it on good authority that Miss Bennet is a vegetarian. If that was Fartistic Licence, Darcy, then it was dashed bad form."
by bromp February 18, 2010
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Bishop's Licence

The Bishop's Licence is bestowed upon a gentleman when his wife is down the shops or otherwise engaged away from the house, and confers on him the right, nay, the duty to wank himself blind.
Bloke 1: You coming down the pub, Bruce?

Bloke 2: Nah Bruce, the missus's at her sister's, I've got the Bishop's Licence.
by hydraulis November 19, 2011
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off licence

In Britain, a shop licenced to sell liquor for consumption off of the premises (as opposed to an On Licence, such as a pub, which is licenced to sell liquor for consumption on the premises).
I went down to the off licence to pick up some wine for tonight.
by C. Lees November 26, 2006
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England's Largest Off-Licence

Place whose sole reason for existence is for English people to go and stock up on alcoholic drink. In other words, France.
I'm on a booze-cruise to England's Largest Off-Licence.
by Dr Pinch September 15, 2004
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