Phrase. Identifying. A individual who always gives "advice" or graces others with there "superior intellect" in a loud annoying way that is common sense(or should be) or has already been stated but now they will say it again in a different tone as if it was never heard or said (short term memory recall), this advice or information is usually given after something has been decided/discussed making the individual feel as though they solved everything and/or nothing would have been decided/done/gained hadnt they "spoken up" these individuals must always have the last word even days later and just a sound; Captain Jackass is not a nick name, this phrase is only use in the type of situation/moment it refers. Traditionally once the individual starts "the thing of it is" speech they are allowed to finish, making this phrase more appropriate as "stupid" doesnt know when to stop once they are pleased with themselves (or youve had enough)give them eye contact and firmly state "THANK YOU CAPTAIN JACKASS!!" Adding a "WELL" in front of the phrase to interrupt is optional; Hopefully there is room for reinforcing/retraining the simple minded brain that the knowledge they DO have is basic at best n adults are talking now, If not you have just learn a wonderful new phrase thats perfect when used properly every time!
1: Did you know if you stand in the road you could get hit by a car?.....Yah i know
2: WELL THANK YOU CAPTAIN JACKASS!! You are a true asset to mankind......scholar to your peers n such ...
1: What ... Captain peers, like captain Malibu honey ...dbdjf....ddfd.. yah i drink that..
2: You want me to hit you with the newspaper again .... ima get it ...
1: Iam going to the bank in the moring because they are closed after 12pm and I n....
*LOUD INTERRUPTING STUPIDITY*
2: You should go to the bank 1st in the morning remeber they close at 12pm and yo....THE THING OF IT IS my sisters brothers half dogs cusin pet trees gmas worked at the bank makr short story long now they owe me money so they say if you give me your money then ill givejz fieobdbdjrvjfndbwhdjdktnfj dd fkd and ..
3: *WITH THE ASSIST* THANK YOU CAPTAIN JACKASS! WE GOT IT !!
1: Thanks bruh I couldnt take it all that gibberish....its like she making words with ABC magnets ...but THEY JUST BANANA STICKERS! .... i owe you
3: Yep ..you sure do sir ..sure do....Ill add it to your BroTab
2: *Talking to self* Oh uh PEE...Thats what i had ment to say i gottda dpeiplldbdbh....
2: WELL THANK YOU CAPTAIN JACKASS!! You are a true asset to mankind......scholar to your peers n such ...
1: What ... Captain peers, like captain Malibu honey ...dbdjf....ddfd.. yah i drink that..
2: You want me to hit you with the newspaper again .... ima get it ...
1: Iam going to the bank in the moring because they are closed after 12pm and I n....
*LOUD INTERRUPTING STUPIDITY*
2: You should go to the bank 1st in the morning remeber they close at 12pm and yo....THE THING OF IT IS my sisters brothers half dogs cusin pet trees gmas worked at the bank makr short story long now they owe me money so they say if you give me your money then ill givejz fieobdbdjrvjfndbwhdjdktnfj dd fkd and ..
3: *WITH THE ASSIST* THANK YOU CAPTAIN JACKASS! WE GOT IT !!
1: Thanks bruh I couldnt take it all that gibberish....its like she making words with ABC magnets ...but THEY JUST BANANA STICKERS! .... i owe you
3: Yep ..you sure do sir ..sure do....Ill add it to your BroTab
2: *Talking to self* Oh uh PEE...Thats what i had ment to say i gottda dpeiplldbdbh....
by ScreenDoor-Junkie July 6, 2022
Get the Captain Jackassmug. by 2moist4u. November 3, 2024
Get the Captain Planet Fartmug. A derogatory term for a faggot who has taken on the persona of the infamous Captain Jack Sparrow from those gay pirate movies.
(Southerner) "Hey whats with the monkey Captain Jackswallows?"
(Typical Yankee) "Shut up prick she's my girlfriend....racist."
(Typical Yankee) "Shut up prick she's my girlfriend....racist."
by SweetDee! November 23, 2011
Get the Captain Jackswallowsmug. by Captain saggy balls August 8, 2017
Get the captain saggy ballsmug. to use a numerous amount of ellipses in a sentence or sentences when responding to someone via text and capitalizing entire words for unnecessary emphasis
Sender of message: I... would LIKE to get to know you... if you're interested... please MESSAGE me...if you want...thanks...
Recipient of message: Wow - really captain kirking this aren't you.
Recipient of message: Wow - really captain kirking this aren't you.
by Bad_Idea_Fairy January 13, 2015
Get the captain kirkingmug. by Lickthatthenmush May 7, 2021
Get the Captain greytoothmug. Captain Ioway can save the world with he help of his pig, Blue Boy, and hius sidekick, Korn Kid. He is the greatest superhero that ever lived. He is from Ioway. When he is not saving the world, he enjoys spending time with the Frake family and adding sugar to his wife's mincemeat.
by statefair December 29, 2011
Get the Captain Iowaymug.