Paper Captain

Choker captain / Paper captain is non other than kohli,because he always chokes in important matches as both batsman and as well as captain,but his clueless fans always defends him with bilateral winning percentage ,though he is a paytm winner he always plays for personal records rather than team's win and he failed completely as acaptain for rcb without a trophy after he done 9 years captaincy but couldn't win a single trophy yet, and rcb also rarely qualify for playoffs under his Captaincy he is the perfect man suitable for choker captain

Even he couldn't better competitive infront of Minnow Intl captains, as a Captain he Just attends bcci board meeting with Drinker Shastri

He is great Paper captain ever

by Rohitian RO November 23, 2020

captain kirking

to use a numerous amount of ellipses in a sentence or sentences when responding to someone via text and capitalizing entire words for unnecessary emphasis

Sender of message: I... would LIKE to get to know you... if you're interested... please MESSAGE me...if you want...thanks...
Recipient of message: Wow - really captain kirking this aren't you.

by Bad_Idea_Fairy January 13, 2015

captain saggy balls

An old grouchy man

Captain saggy balls over is always complaining about the prices of food.

by Captain saggy balls August 8, 2017

Captain Machine

a bozo who has the IQ of a peanut and cant seal the deal.
He thinks hes a good wrestler but in the end hes just a lame ass bum who took steriods to win. Captain Stretchy is the real champ. I am not Captain Stretchy

Hey you just killed a cute kitty. Good one Captain Machine!

by Captain Midget May 14, 2006

Solut the Captain

A shot of Absolut Vodka either mixed or chased with Captain Morgan spiced rum.

Man the fuck up and Solut the Captain!

by Arish A July 13, 2011

Captain Jackass

Phrase. Identifying. A individual who always gives "advice" or graces others with there "superior intellect" in a loud annoying way that is common sense(or should be) or has already been stated but now they will say it again in a different tone as if it was never heard or said (short term memory recall), this advice or information is usually given after something has been decided/discussed making the individual feel as though they solved everything and/or nothing would have been decided/done/gained hadnt they "spoken up" these individuals must always have the last word even days later and just a sound; Captain Jackass is not a nick name, this phrase is only use in the type of situation/moment it refers. Traditionally once the individual starts "the thing of it is" speech they are allowed to finish, making this phrase more appropriate as "stupid" doesnt know when to stop once they are pleased with themselves (or youve had enough)give them eye contact and firmly state "THANK YOU CAPTAIN JACKASS!!" Adding a "WELL" in front of the phrase to interrupt is optional; Hopefully there is room for reinforcing/retraining the simple minded brain that the knowledge they DO have is basic at best n adults are talking now, If not you have just learn a wonderful new phrase thats perfect when used properly every time!

1: Did you know if you stand in the road you could get hit by a car?.....Yah i know

2: WELL THANK YOU CAPTAIN JACKASS!! You are a true asset to mankind......scholar to your peers n such ...
1: What ... Captain peers, like captain Malibu honey ...dbdjf....ddfd.. yah i drink that..
2: You want me to hit you with the newspaper again .... ima get it ...

1: Iam going to the bank in the moring because they are closed after 12pm and I n....
*LOUD INTERRUPTING STUPIDITY*
2: You should go to the bank 1st in the morning remeber they close at 12pm and yo....THE THING OF IT IS my sisters brothers half dogs cusin pet trees gmas worked at the bank makr short story long now they owe me money so they say if you give me your money then ill givejz fieobdbdjrvjfndbwhdjdktnfj dd fkd and ..
3: *WITH THE ASSIST* THANK YOU CAPTAIN JACKASS! WE GOT IT !!

1: Thanks bruh I couldnt take it all that gibberish....its like she making words with ABC magnets ...but THEY JUST BANANA STICKERS! .... i owe you

3: Yep ..you sure do sir ..sure do....Ill add it to your BroTab
2: *Talking to self* Oh uh PEE...Thats what i had ment to say i gottda dpeiplldbdbh....

by ScreenDoor-Junkie July 6, 2022

take one of the captain

1. Taking a picture of your dick or asking someone else to. Often said or requested when someone is already taking a picture.

2. Snapping a dick pic

1. She's so thirsty , I'm gonna take one of the captain .

2. Boyfriend: hey, I'm gonna send you some selfies tonight.

Girlfriend: don't forget to take one of the Captain Too ;)

Boyfriend: Only if you send me some too

Girlfriend: Deal!

by PlasmaPony June 8, 2018