A dick in the mouth is worth two in the hand

A blowjob is worth the value of two handjobs. Frequently used in negotiations by cheap hookers. Not to be confused with the meaningful expression involving birds and bushes.

HOOKER: "Okay you got two blowjobs and half a handjob, that will be $4.50"
DUDE: "What? That's a bit steep, I thought you told me a handjob was only a dollar!"
HOOKER: "Its fair. A dick in the mouth is worth two in the hand"

by fgsdfsq November 4, 2014

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a dick in the bush is worth two in the hand

Sex with a woman is always preferable to jerking off

You coming to the party? There's going to be lots of trim.
Nah, gonna stay in and jerk off.

C'mon, dude, a dick in the bush is worth two in the hand.

by Shuaman December 13, 2016

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One in the hand and two in the bush

Verb
1. The sexual act of jerking off with one hand, and pushing your balls into your girlfriend's muff with the other.

"I was with my GF the other day, and I gave her one in the hand and two in the bush.

by Kidlover69 July 26, 2014

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two to the dome

To fire two bullets into the purposed victim.

"PAP" "PAP"... "two to the dome" fucker.

by devisible September 20, 2006

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A puke in the hand is worth two in the bush

Referring to the fact that when you're out drinking with your friends, it is twice as hilarious to see someone puke in their hands (preferrably so everyone can see) as it is when said person makes it out of sight to puke (like behind a bush).

That was embarrassing the way you puked in your hands at the bar last night, but you know what they say, a puke in the hand is worth two in the bush.

by SHQCKEY October 5, 2011

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