real jesus tears

Real Jesus tears is when something very truamatic has occurred and you begin to cry. The tears are not the same at just crying though. When you cry real Jesus tears you can feel the pain and suffering in your chest and stomach.

I failed my final exam, when I got the paper back I cried real Jesus tears.

by Just frickin peachy February 6, 2017

Tearing it off

1. An extreme session of masturbation brought on by being male.

see tugging: The more intense form of "tugging it".

I haven't seen Fahim in a couple days. He must be tearing it off.

by Coinsmith August 13, 2010

Penis Tear

The last drop of cum that can be squeezed out of the penis after ejaculating.

Shit I didn't get that last penis tear out.

I got a penis tear in my boxers.

by Free Dan January 24, 2013

Anal hair tear

When a man plucks his anal hairs.

Jeff: Dude my ass hair was getting so long and I didn't want to cut myself trying to shave so I did an Anal hair tear.

by hatesjeff November 14, 2009

tear you a new asshole

tear you a new asshole to be beaten senseless or near death to the point of not being able to fight back

man your girlfriend is so ugly and is going to have an ugly baby

dude, you better shut up about my girlfriend and our baby or I'm going to tear you a new asshole

man are you threatening me

yes man you better back off

ok man I get you

by littlejimmie November 22, 2019

tears

The blood of the soul. When the soul bleeds, you cry.

I started to cut myself and cried a puddle of tears, playing that sad song in the back of my head.

by Jace Noelle March 10, 2007

Poop tears

Crying or tearing up while defecating.

"Man, that was a good dump."
"Hold up. Are those poop tears?"

by copybarber March 7, 2012