squat cobbler

The erotic act of a male squatting to dip his genitalia into a freshly baked pie or cobbler.

Clay: "Damn, my balls are sticky and covered in blueberries this morning."
Billy: "Yeah, you got toasted and ended up being a fucking squat cobbler last night."

by TheMaDsQuatter August 30, 2016

squat cobbler

A type of art form that involves a fully clothed person sitting in pies. The performer is also known to cry during the performance.

Also known as a Full Moon Moon Pie, Boston Creme Spat, Simple Sign In The Ass Man, and Dutch Apple Ass.

Jimmy: Mr Daniel Wormald was known for his squat cobbler.

by IJustWatchedThis September 3, 2016

gooch cobbler

The quagulated pasty sauce that forms in the gooch area while your lady rides you on her period.

My wife had to stop riding me,because the gooch cobbler was running down my butt.

by Jdizzlefromtctx December 4, 2017

squat cobbler

aka

Hoboken Squat Cobbler
Full Moon Moon Pie
Boston Cream Splat
Simple Simon, the Ass Man
Dutch Apple Ass

When a man sits in pie and wiggles around. Often involves a costume.

A weird fetish Saul Goodman tells the Albuquerque police about in Better Call Saul S2:E2 "Cobbler".

A: Have you seen the tape, where Playuh is dooin the squat cobbler on that banana cream pie?
B: Wasn't that a crybaby squat? I mean, he cried like a baby, didn't he?
A: How would I know?

by pondababa September 2, 2016

squat cobbler

It's when a fully clothed man sits on a pie and wiggles his butt around. Can be categorized as a "Fetish".

Jimmy hid his squat cobbler videos in his secret compartment.

by CobblerSquatter September 3, 2016

squat cobbler

An act, normally performed on video, intended to titillate the senses. This act is technically a fetish, but (and this is important) it is NOT ILLEGAL! Squat Cobbler involves a fully clothed man, all by himself, who sits in a pie and wiggles around. The more extreme varieties of this lewd act is known as "Cry Baby Squat Cobbler", or "Cry Baby Squat" for short, which involves tears. Usually, the more tears, the more taboo it is considered to be, and to a certain audience, more desirable.

The term originates from the eastern United States where it is commonly called "Hoboken Squat Cobbler" and, like Hellman's Mayonnaise, is called something different west of the Rocky Mountains.

In the midwest it is simply referred to as "pie sitting"

See also full moon moon pie boston crème splat simple simon the ass man dutch apple ass pie sitting Hoboken squat cobbler

Jeff came over and was paid handsomely to perform the Hoboken squat cobbler into a still hot dutch apple pie.

The man does a mean and quite sexy squat cobbler. There are tears, and lots of wriggling! He even wears a batman costume!

by pseudonymnonominon July 29, 2016

Hoboken Squat Cobbler

Someone who takes videos of himself squatting naked on a pie, preferably of the cream type variety, and masturbating much to the delight of his intended viewer.

He's in the other room making a video with a pie. He's a Hoboken Squat Cobbler.

by Yankwood August 29, 2016