Salty Almond

When a man defecates then ejaculates on his feces. He then let's it dry and become crusty, then feeds it to his partner.

This can be carried out Man to Man or Man to Woman.

She was into the Skat shit, so I gave her a Salty Almond.

by Tommygun3833 May 11, 2017

Marc Almond

Marc Almond is a beautiful boy from Leeds, England. You may know him from Soft Cell, or Marc Almond and The Willing Sinners, or Marc And The Mambas. He is super duper talented and very freaking adorable. He is in his early sixties now and is still doing fine.

Marc Almond from 84’ is my daddy

by amusicobsessedgal May 22, 2019

Crap Almond

Means everything and everyone. Can be used in any situation but especially useful in expressing emotion.

How did your test go?
I failed it, I totally feel like a crap almond.

by happinesswithwings January 9, 2009

crunchy almond mom

A mom who believes that vaccines cause autism, essential oils will heal every ailment and who only feed their children "organic" food.

"She bought an entire case of organic water, what a crunchy almond mom"

by lexistexas May 1, 2023

Cranberry Almond Crunch

When you give someone a bowl of rocks and milk and trick them into eating it, so they mouth get all bloody, and they teeth fall out like cranberry almonds.

I have to wear dentures now because Denise served me a cranberry almond crunch.

by Storm Thurmond July 7, 2010

activated almond

An upper middle-class wellness/paleo/vegan type who is in a state of being activated by a wellness-related issue, eg. unspecified inflammation, bone broth, the rising price of kale.

Gwyneth is being such an activated almond over this vaginal steaming.

by ZitaB September 18, 2018

Slobbery Almond

Main Entry: slobb-er-y a-lmond
Function: noun, verb
Etymology: (Hebrew: עֲמוֹרָה)
History: First appeared in early Hebrew scrolls in the classic story of Sodom and Gomorrah. The perverse sexual act was removed in modern day versions of the Old Testament.

Definition: When a man forces his testicles into the anus of his partner (male or female)

noun|

You: "I gave her the good ol' slobbery almond last night."

Friend: "Yeesh"

verb |

You: "I slobbery almonded (or almond slobberied) her last night."

Friend: "Wow"

by Otineb January 15, 2010