Costa Wanker

A young wanna be hipster who always goes to the Costa Coffee machines at petrol stations.

' Look at that Costa Wanker waiting for his shit latte'

Or

'I can't get a coffee because the que is full of Costa wankers'

by dog tits July 5, 2016

audi wanker

A group of middle aged men, trying there utmost not to have a mid life crisis. They think they own the road. They seem to think they look cool. When in actual fact they’re simply an ‘Audi Wanker’.
:)

Move out of my way!!!!! Audi wanker !!!!!

by Kel-Kel :) August 8, 2018

Travel Wanker

Travel Wanker (Noun): One who travels in Asia or South America in hopes of "finding themselves". Wears genie pants, neglects basic hygiene, doesn't wear shoes and constantly tells you about how relinquishing their material possessions pushed them to a higher spiritual plain.

"Look at the top-knot on that travel wanker."
"What was the hostel like? Couldn't handle it, full of travel wankers."

by IrishNBA September 30, 2018

Word Wanker

Someone proficient in manipulating language to express complex thoughts in a simple way

"Wow Laura managed to fit such a complex thought into only ONE tweet?! I'd need a whole thread! She's such a word wanker."

by laura898 November 26, 2020

Cheese Wanker

Someone who fancies themselves to be a cheese expert and can't stop talking about cheese.

He's such a cheese wanker! Every time we eat cheese, he can't stop talking. I just want to eat the damn cheese. I don't need to hear about how it was made, what the cow was fed and how many times a week the cheesemaker brushed the cheese!

by TheCheeseWanker April 13, 2022

wanker's tan

Pasty complexion sported by young men who spend far too much time alone in the bedroom with the curtains pulled shut.

'I've just got grand theft auto san andreas for christmas, so i'll be spending the next few months working on my wanker's tan.'

by Chuckle Mother May 13, 2005

full kit wanker

A grown man wearing a full football kit in a public place other than a football pitch. Football Shirt, shorts and socks. This may also apply to other full sports kit wearers in similar situations. You will naturally think/say ' What a wanker'. Therefore 'What a full kit wanker' is applicable.

Man/Woman in any place other than actually playing the sport. Maybe in the High Street, Pub,public transport.......Anywhere in fact!!! Even on the Terraces at the match!!! Anybody commiting this crime is a 'Full kit wanker'.

by Sharkyyoung October 31, 2013