Regulation Ranger

The US ARMY has always maintained its' own cultural norms and behaviors. Longstanding jokes and traditions are part of the very make up and fabric of everyday soldier life. One such longstanding, common euphymism was the identification of "Barracks" titles. There was the "Barracks Barber", usually a lower enlisted who would undercut the Post barber by offering cheaper (and usually better) haircuts within the actual barracks. Of course, there came to be a "Barracks Lawyer" to compliment whatever legal dispute or disciplinary claims that soldiers inquire about. To supercede the "Barracks Lawyer" there is now such an appropriate personal title as "Regulation Ranger". Usually a Regulation Ranger has over an average of 7 years of total service, and usually at least one combat deployment. By a wide margin, most Regulation Rangers happen to hold a rank of Staff Sergeant or above. Most Regulation Rangers are ARMY RESERVISTS as well, and hold absolutely zero authority in their regular, stateside, full time career. As a result of their obvious insecurity towards their duties as a leader, most Regulation Rangers study the ARMY Regulation books in their free time. The point of studying regulation books is so that they may exert their authority over those subordinate to them. Most Regulation Rangers are not only insecure, but many have power and responsibility complexes as well. Never far behind a unit commander or senior NCO is a Regulation Ranger, always manipulating and methodically playing "games" so as to implement more and more useless rules. When the implementation of a new rule is emplaced, a Regulation Ranger is satisfied. Unfortunately, this micromanagement doesn't stop, for it spreads among their like-minded counterparts that are bucking for rank. The only way to defeat a Regulation Ranger is to outperform and outclass them in every possible aspect.

Usually being in the ranks of E-6 to E-9, most Regulation Rangers are insecure and have control complexes.

A Regulation Ranger can implement whatever rules they wish to, and often make up redundant, useless rules right on the fly.

"Hey, you can't wear a knife on your belt. It says so in the regs!"

"Hey! You're only allowed to lift weights after 1700, it was put out in the regs"

"You're not allowed to take more than one pop-tart from Class 1. It says somewhere in the regs!"

by gatesoftanhauser May 15, 2009

First Date Regulations for Men

1. 90 minutes maximum
2. Show up on time, but no earlier than 15 minutes.

3. Dress how you usually dress. Don’t wear a suit unless you’re coming from a meeting.
4. Have cash in your wallet. Not because you need it. Just trust me.
5. If you can’t afford to have cash in your wallet, you can’t afford a girlfriend.
6. Ripped jeans don’t look good
7. Have a reason to leave after 90 minutes. Make some shit up if you need to.

8. Don’t say you like something just because she does. If you despise it, don’t pretend to play along.

9. Bring a condom. You never know.

10. Just in case, have a Backup Call

Idk what to do for this date.

“Man, just review the first date regulations for men, that’s what they’re there for.”

by TheAlwaysCorrect1 December 18, 2021

rectal recreation in the anal arena

when 2 or more guys have a friendly competition in a game of butt darts

"hey jacob, some guys are having rectal recreation later if you want to join in"

by bob dole October 5, 2004

radulations

An expression of praise for an individual that has not only achieved success in some part of life, but that success is also particularly rad.

Radulations on your new high paying job as Jessica Alba's personal boob massager.

by tendrinkdrunk June 24, 2008

Self-regulation

That's the issue, isn't it?

Hym "You know, the participants ask 'what can I do to get him to do what I want him to do?' and the answer is 'nothing until the problem is acknowledged'. I've outlined the problem. You all refuse to acknowledge it. You have attributed to me an inability to self-regulate. You've taken it upon yourself to step in (in Orwellian fashion) to aggregate and disseminate information. The purpose is irrelevant. The presupposition of the act is that you are capable of self-regulation so this doesn't need to happen to you but I am incapable of self-regulation (in a way that you are not) and so your surveillance of me is not only justified but necessary. You are not qualified to make that assessment. Nor do you have the authority. You will do the thing I want you to do or I will do a thing I don't want to do in direct response to the act. It's the only choice you've left me. Hurry it up. I haven't got all morning."

by Hym Iam May 20, 2022

cast recolation surgery

A word you say when you told your girlfriend you broke your leg and really didnt. You say your in your home resting your leg (when your really playing basketball outside) and she wants to come over and see your cast. You tell her you cant because your about to go get a cast recolation surgery. It works. Trust me.

GF: Hey do you wanna hang out tomorrow?

Guy: Sorry i broke my leg and im getting a cast recolation surgery.

GF: Oh my word! That sounds terrible!

by Romanisrad February 22, 2009

Reelationship

To string someone along making them believe they are your friend or that the relationship is real and then yanking them out of the water like a fish and destroying their reality.

I had a reelationship with her until she bought me a car, then I told her I was sleeping with her sister.

by WordKing69 July 2, 2015