Pretzel Vagina

When a woman's vagina is so overly dry not even KY jelly can help. Basically a lost cause for men. A phrase often paired with cheese tits.

"How was your night with the old lady, she didn't have pretzel vagina again did she?"

"I'd have sex with her if she didn't have such cheese tits and a pretzel vagina"

by Nester17 December 10, 2013

Neapolitan Pretzel

After ejaculating in a woman’s anus you then proceed to shove a pretzel rod as deep as you can while maintaining a firm grip. Using a corkscrew motion you proceed to turn the rod and shove it in and out while not breaking the pretzel, all while she is thrashing. Quickly removing the pretzel yields a chocolate, vanilla and strawberry rainbow of feces, semen and blood. The pretzel may be shared by both as you cuddle.

I knew Kristen was a freak, but had no idea until she suggested we share a Neapolitan pretzel.

by Slippin' pee hands January 28, 2019

Pretzel Catcher

A bar fly that has no money, who is willing to do chores around the bar for free drinks.

Look at JHonda sweeping the floor at the Bonner Road Inn, what a pretzel catcher.

by T-Dawg2017 September 20, 2018

Compton Pretzel

The epitome of a great threesome. Two men sit on the ground, legs overlapping, forming a diamond shape. The female, then, sits her naked bum atop the diamond and inserts one penis into her vaginal canal, and the other into her rectum. All three partners then begin thrashing their pelvic regions around in a violent manner until simultaneous orgasm has been reached.

"Hey Booka, wanna make a Compton pretzel with me n Phallap?"

by Phallap 'n' Gurrat September 24, 2014

speak pretzel

To tell a twisted tale that ought to be taken with a grain of salt.

Person A: Did you hear what she said?
Person B: Yeah, but she tends to speak pretzel so you can't believe it.

by NamelessKiller August 20, 2015

vagina pretzel

backwards kegel; a loosening of the vaginal muscles in order prolong sex

Don't worry about cumming too soon, I'll do my vagina pretzels.

by californication roxs May 25, 2009

Human Pretzel

When two people take off their clothes, get under the covers and begin to make out, their bodies subconsciously start to intertwine themselves until the two people form a single unit- resembling a pretzel. This 'pretzeling effect' usually leads to sex or conversely sex will ultimately lead to the formation of a Human Pretzel. The repetitive formation of the Human Pretzel is also responsible for the release of Oxitocin into the bloodstream.

I was late getting into work this morning because I got stuck in a human pretzel.

by dclaw1 January 17, 2012