wanking ears

'Wanking ears' is the expression for the vastly increased sensitivity of one's hearing while they are masturbating. This is a protection system so that no-one will walk in on you while masturbating, which could be an extremely embarrassing experience. Even the slightest footsteps out in the hallway will be picked up by your "wanking ears", and by the time this person comes into the room, should they decide to, you will have had time to close down the pornographic website/video you were watching, and zip up your jeans.

Similar to beer goggles, which is the effect of alcohol on sight, this is the effect of masturbation on auditory awareness.

<Pete> brb, wank
<Dave> isn't your mum in?
<Pete> it's ok, my wanking ears will protect me

by Strach May 16, 2006

Pentatonic Wanking

Overuse of the pentatonic scale in music . The definition of SHITTY GUITAR SOLOS

One by metallica is a good song, but the solo is just pentatonic wanking and fucking tapping

by Knibnobber February 10, 2015

Pan wanking

When cooking, you shake the pan backwards and forwards to stir or shake the contents without the use of a utensil.

Mostly done by chefs

"need a spoon?"
"no thanks, i'm happy pan wanking."

by Blue_devil February 28, 2009

Wanking Time

A period of time in a day, or over multiple days, designated specifically for premeditated wanking. Often used by, and possibly invented by the British. Is more sophisticated than random wanking because of a longer period of time for preperation and clean-up.

"Sorry but in less than an hour its wanking time, I just can't meet with you today"

by nubcake October 16, 2006

wanking face

The face one pulls while in the act of masterbating

Lol you should see martins wanking face, it looks like his seen a ghost and got a wheelbarrow up his ass

by mitch00uk March 31, 2015

wankily

An adjective describing something so fucking awesome and memorable. Mostly a time or experience you've spend together with somebody.

Might be in a sexual context but dosn't necessarily has to be in one.

Pete: So how was your night out in London last week-end
Johannes: was great. we definetly had a wankily good time

by wasn August 2, 2009

wanking with dinosaurs

BBC TV show (yet unaired) about the masturbatory customs of Tyrannosaurus Sex, Orgasmosaurus Ferox and other Mezozoic critters.

Did you know that little Velociraptors got off by humping the leg of giant sauropods?
Did you know that Microraptor Zhaoianus had a feathered dork?
If you didn't, then watch Wanking With Dinosaurs!

by Hugh G Rection May 29, 2005