shit mitt

The process of wrapping your hand in multiple layers of toilet paper preventing fecal contamination.

I always use a shit mitt when dropping deuce in a public restroom.

by ChipScar July 23, 2010

Shit-mitt

A hand thats been up someones arse.Sometimes covered with fecal matter. Hence, the name shit-mitt.

Yo i gave Daves mom a fist in the ass. She gave me a serious shit-mitt.

by Bobby Cumbucket May 21, 2006

Shit mittens

The improvised action of cutting out the lining or fabric from one’s pants pocket to repurpose it as an emergency substitute for toilet paper when no conventional options are available, often in desperate or remote situations. This makeshift solution provides a quick, albeit unconventional, means of personal hygiene, though it may result in compromised clothing integrity.

In the heat of a top-secret op behind enemy lines, Private Murphy, facing a dire “logistical crisis” with no TP in sight, stealthily converted his camo pants into shit mittens—proving once again that soldiers improvise, adapt, and overcome… even if it means walking funny for the rest of the mission.

by VoodooJack November 16, 2025

mitt the shit

A shape shifting LDS hustler with a spray on tan.

Mitt the shit

by yoopertj March 14, 2014

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by TheGeneralGenitalsPranksterian May 6, 2025

shitmitt

A fecalphobic response to the necessity of having to wipe one's own uptarded ass whereby said swine mummifies his/her hoof with a crapper clogging amount of old growth toilet paper in a daily All-American celebration of excess and waste.

That shitphobic corporate pig, Dick Cheney, nuked my crapper, then clogged it with his uptarded shitmitt.

by mrwhiipl February 11, 2004

Shitmittens

Someone so totally incompetent they manage to ruin everything they touch, as if someone was wearing mittens made out of shit. As useful replacement for the term asshat

We could get this project done a lot faster if shitmittens over here would stop accidentally deleting the files.

by DrBruz October 17, 2014