Pot noodle and a wank

Refering to a lousy evening spent home alone with bad food, TV-repeats and probably masturbation.

I was out last night and today he tells me:"you look knackered mate". And im thinking yeah, you look like you`ve had a pot noodle and a wank, mate.

by AluXeZ January 10, 2010

Pot Noodle Head

A person who has hair that looks like a pot noodle.

Look at that Pot Noodle Head Richard over there.

by TankoManko February 24, 2015

Pot Noodle Day

On the 21st October, 19th September and February 16th. You must eat a pot noodle. You deserve it.

I would also like to thank my friends Tiffany and Zara.
By Susan

"Hey Mum, Can I Have A Pot Noodle?"
"Why?"
"Because, Today Is Pot Noodle Day!"

by theooficer January 19, 2021

Pot noodle wank

Pot noodle wank, a pot noodle wank is when your bird goes out for a steak dinner, and leaves you home alone to fend for yourself, thus leaving oneself lonely and hungry with the only option of a Pot Noodle Wank.

Liam: what you doing for tea tonight Tweed?
Tweed: Well, Laura’s gone out for dinner with friends, looks like it’s Pot Noodle Wank and maybes a cry for me tonight.

Liam: is there room for one more?

by Ashweehehe July 31, 2019

Pot Noodle Horn

1) An advertising campaign/gimmick by the Pot Noodle company about people who blow huge horns when they want pot noodle.

2) Now synonymous in England with having a boner/stiffy/erection or being amorous or horny in any way.

1)
Advert: "Do you have the Pot Noodle Horn?"

Veiwer: "lol, wut?"

2)
Bob: "Man that girl was so hot, I had the pot noodle horn!"

by lul, whuts? November 3, 2008

Pot Noodle Psychosis

The psychological state of someone who cares too much for their own vanity and fears being rejected by someone they want to go out on a date with, so never actually asking them out.

They prefer to live with the security of knowing "what might have been," even if that security means they will live out the rest of their data eating pot noodles, wanking and crying.

Did you hear about that bloke who fancied that girl and never asked her out? He had a severe case of Pot Noodle Psychosis.

by pixelfingers September 3, 2016

Pot Noodle Horn

An odd gimick that seems to make no sense at all. Used in televised adverts and only suceeds in confusing the audience. The creation of Pot Noodle.

Pot Noodle failed when they invented the 'Pot Noodle Horn'.

by lordpestilence July 31, 2005