fixer-downer

Real estate term referring to a house so dilapidated that even fixing it UP wouldn't make it attractive.

Amelia: "I'm sending you a listing of a fixer-upper. It needs a lot of work but the price is good and so is the location."
Bob (upon receiving the listing): "You've gotta be kidding me, Amelia. Looks more like a fixer-downer to me. Take another gander."

by stockman09 January 7, 2008

fever dream

a very unpleasant dream.

My whole life feels like a fever dream.

by itsallafeverdream January 8, 2022

Five Dollar Sniffer

Giving a stripper $5 to sniff her ass

That old guy just got a five dollar sniffer.

by BubblesPBR May 8, 2015

And then a hobo walked out, burst into flames, and gave me a free refrigerator with a purchase of five dollars or more

What you say at the end of a lame story, or during an awkward silence. Can be used instead of "and then I found 20 dollars" or "and that's why you never milk an ostrich"

Alana: So... I was walking yesterday, and I saw a llama. He looked at me, and then he fell asleep. So I went home because I was tired. And then I went to sleep. When I woke up it was 7:00 so I went to school

Amy:...

Alana: And then a hobo walked out, burst into flames, and gave me a free refrigerator with a purchase of five dollars or more

by TheGreatKateWeatherMachine October 30, 2011

Fiber Deposit

A slang term for a bowel movement.

I'll be back in 45 minutes. I've got to go make a fiber deposit

by Steve_Juggernaut April 2, 2011

Fever Dream

A dream induced by high body temperature, the dream is usually crazy and obserd.

I had a fever dream where Jesus kick a banana to the moon.

by Oh no, a fever dream! March 11, 2021

and then I found five dollars and a bag of weed

Some stories are so boring, even adding and then I found five dollars won't save them. Adding "and then I found five dollars and a bag of weed" to the end of your boring ass story, will validate for your friends all that time and facial expressiveness they just wasted listening to it, and they will remember why they are friends with you in the first place, because a friend with weed is a friend indeed.

"Oh man, Friday, I really wanted an egg salad sandwich and I was just obsessing about it and I was like, 'Man, I'm gonna make one of those.' So Saturday, I went out and got, like, a dozen eggs and then I boiled them all and I just, I spent, I dunno, probably three hours, like three and a half hours making, you know, the mayonnaise, and the onions and paprika and, you know, the necessary accoutrement. And then, by the time I was done, I didn't really feel like like eating it...and then I found five dollars and a bag of weed..."

"Bet you felt like eating the sandwich then! Oh man, when are we hanging out, Andy?"

by SchoolSaboteur May 15, 2010