condiment king

one who hoards free ketchup packets, mustard packets, relish, salt, pepper, sugar, and so on. occasionally has tons of free napkins as well.

person 1: hey, you wanna see something?
person 2: uhh, sure i guess.
*pulls out drawer filled with assorted condiments*
person 1: CALL ME THE CONDIMENT KING!

by Organplayerdoner December 26, 2011

Condiment Salad

When a person who is cheap makes a "free" salad from the fixings bar at a burger restaurant. They will pile shredded lettuce with onions, tomatoes and whatever else is available on the bar.

They will make their own salad dressing by mixing ketchup with mayonnaise and relish.

The condiment salad is usually made on a hamburger wrapper or basket liner.

The condiment salad goes well with Jewish lemonade and is popular with the mature Florida set.

Family members are generally horrified by the actions and tend to sit on the other side of the room away from them.

Mom, tell me you aren't going to cheap out and make a condiment salad to go with your jewish lemonade and pay nothing.

by Patty B Wyte September 3, 2019

sleeping condiments

Anything you sleep with or need to get to sleep. i.e.: Pillows, blankets, lingerie, teddy bears, blow up dolls, or blow up mattresses.

Don't forget to bring your sleeping condiments when you come for the fourth.

by MamaPea July 8, 2017

Coniferus Nipplepuffin

A medical condition where the nipples puff out due to enlarged breast buds.

OMG look at my nipples! Must be a case of coniferus nipplepuffin.

by iexist89 February 26, 2010

Condimental Divide

When you and your romantic partner, spouse, family member, or friend share opposing, strong opinions about a specific condiment, such as ketchup/catsup or mayonnaise.
-As coined by Mark Garrison on the podcast "The Sporkful".

Person 1: "You like Miracle Whip? Gross!"
Person 2: "No, mayo is gross; Miracle Whip is good."
Person 1: "We can't hang out anymore. I can't get over the Condimental Divide."

Person 1: "I dumped my girlfriend because she put ketchup on her hot dog. That's just WRONG!"
Person 2: "Another relationship destroyed by the Condimental Divide."

by JRadimus April 10, 2011

coimetromania

An abnormal attraction to and desire to visit cementeries.

"Why do you want to stop at every cementerie we pass? You mus have Coimetromania!"

by Yummy Mummy Of 7 July 31, 2019

conmercial

Noun: a television, radio, print or internet commercial produced and promulgated with the specific intent to deceive, mislead or confuse the viewer in regard to the motives, purposes and/or activities of the entity producing the commercial. Particularly ubiquitous among political parties, energy conglomerates, tobacco companies, and other large organizations whose primary operation is likely to incur negative public opinion or regulatory scrutiny.

“Ever since the general public became aware of the consequences of global warming, big oil and its dependents have produced one conmercial after another to divert attention from, and discourage any alternatives to, their carbon intensive, environmentally detrimental practices.”

by Speedog 2 February 21, 2011