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Dry Tortugas

A U.S. national park in the Gulf of Mexico. Also known to a group of unfortunate few, the act of dry heaving out of your ass. This usually happens after a long episode of watery diarrhea. Your ass opens, goes through all the motions, your sphincter may even prolapse a little, but nothing at all comes out! And if you listen closely, you may even hear your butt hole open and shut as is fails to discharge any fecal matter.
JACOB:Hey Mike I'm gonna stop and grab a burrito bowl on my way into work. You want me to grab you something too?
MIKE: No way dude. Last time I ate one, I am pretty sure the guacamole was bad. I had the "Dry Tortugas" all night!
by CharlesUFarley June 7, 2018
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Tortuga

The spanish word for turtle or tortoise. Used to describe someone that works/moves extremely slow.
Chef 1: "Look at this fucking clown work, he's slow as dirt"
Chef 2: "Fucking tortuga"
by ItsFlan May 14, 2013
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Tortuga head ache

the act of using a native Caribbean mans shoe or sandal as a funnel/filter for a mixture of sweat ,ass, piss and rum.
collage bro: "why are you in the hospital bra its still spring break".
crippled suffering collage bro: "i got a Tortuga head ache bra".
Florida doctor dude:" gnarly bra" .
by nessy gen 3 January 10, 2018
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dry tortuga

When your girl's laying on her back but isn't in the mood and won't let you past the shell.
I took her out for dinner and drinks, but when we got back she was a dry tortuga.
by midgetmugger December 7, 2017
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Isla Tortuga

A small Central American island known for its abundance of Tortilla Trees, which grow both flour and corn fruit that is flattened into tortillas. In English, the name translates to “Tortilla Island.”
Holy shit! Nothing tastes better than a tortilla picked fresh from the tree on Isla Tortuga!
by Grand Mayor of Isla Tortuga April 24, 2023
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Tortuga

A mythical male animal - boyfriend of the female Tortugita - and king of the drug underworld.
Tortuga's gonna fuck you up.
by Stinky223 September 19, 2018
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tortuga blanca

by Flower in japanese May 4, 2011
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