Stool Softener

An object placed upon a hard chair ( i.e. a stool ) in the form of a cushion or a similar device, used to soften the area that is sat upon. Commonly used when a person will remain stationary for extended periods of time, such as when one is gaming.

"Dude, my ass is falling asleep. Hand me a stool softener."

by RunawayPanda January 19, 2014

Soften the Cheese

Performing favors for a compatriot in order to receive desired attention often involving alcohol.

Ryan wouldn't invite me to his going away party until I soften the cheese with a new bottle of bourbon.

by Squach June 1, 2012

tooth-softening

adj. When you see something utterly disgusting that gives you the awful gross feeling that makes your teeth soft, that thing is tooth-softening.

Science teacher: "And just look at that wonderful rotting pig heart!"
Annie (to Sophie): "That's so gross..."
Sophie: "Not just gross. It's tooth-softening."

by FenwayFoulke May 3, 2007

Soften the peach

To get the pussy wet

You get a few drinks in her to soften the peach and she'll be good to go!

by Swampguzzler March 11, 2019

the stool softener

A homo or heterosexual act of intensely pounding the colon into utter submission. Most often performed with a full intestinal load of feces, ready for expelment. The act is ended with the anus exploding out the contents into the softener-er's hot ejaculatory goo.

Frenchy hated his ex-girlfriend so much for giving him Hep-C, he performed "The Stool Softener" on her the next weekend when she called up drunk and wanted some action. She passed out in a warm Spunk Loaf later that night.

by e-rips December 16, 2003

soften the meat

Phrase used to describe a police officer's application of the baton upside the head of some stupid bastard who deserves it.

Frank was watching "COPS" last night when we were over. We watched some dudes who stole some poor lady's car and went on a high speed chase all over town. They rammed several cop cars then totalled the stolen car on an embankment. Damn, it was good to see the officers soften the meat on the driver!

by Frank Klaune May 1, 2005

fabric softener

what is fabric softener

is this fabric softener

by what is fabric softener March 9, 2017