e-sturbation

1. Expression of sexual gratification online via cybersex.

2. Masturbation to anything else that happens online and/or that is viewed that is sexually gratifying.

1. I am e-sturbating furiously right now! (message typed as the guy has cybersex with this hot Swedish chick.)

2. Hey hold on! I'm very busy e-sturbating to these lesbo pics of Aria Giovanni at her official site!

by Mark H August 25, 2004

Cry-sturbation

A jealousy-induced form of regretful masturbation; usually occurs after one realizes their ex no longer wants them and/or after seeing them "getting it in" with a new lover.

Dude is Devin crying? ...Dude is Devin masturbating? Oh Shit! That poor bastard's cry-sturbating!

After seeing his ex playing tonsil hockey with her new man at the superbowl party, Devin scampered away to his room for an all night session of loud & painfully pleasant cry-sturbation.

by Florida Dwarf Killer March 4, 2011

shituation

When a situation is absolutely shitty.

-Did you see what happened to Jen? Her boyfriend was caught using her underwears
- What a shituation!

by Wally_Gator July 9, 2021

Sasturbation

Is the process of heating a hand towel with a little water in the microwave and proceeding too fuck it

"The girlfriend wasn't giving up the pussy so I sasturbated instead."
" Man i hate when sasturbation keeps me up all night"

by Mohammed Twain May 14, 2013

Shituation

A shitty situation for everyone except Sean Connery

Guy1: I got caught wanking in the exam hall
Guy2: Sounds like a bloody shituation bro.

by rujuunnum June 9, 2017

Emergency Shituation

When a baby poops themselves in an awkward way, time or place, and if the baby is not changed immediately things will only get worse!

*Prrrrrchhhht* "Oh No!" they said as they saw the poop running down the baby's leg and into the stroller. With no more wipes this is an Emergency Shituation!!

by hardwarehunney514 June 11, 2011

shituation

A shitty situation

My life is a shituation.

by I stole your girl January 15, 2017