Portugese Chopsticks

The act of simultaneously penetrating a woman's asshole and vagina at the same time with ones penis and a strapon in a way so that said accessories look like chopsticks.

I was trying the "Portugese Chopsticks" with your mother the other day when she realized there was no deli meet in the fridge. Thus explaining the lack of meat in your sandwich.

by Dzzz July 30, 2011

brazilian portugese

A clear form of Portugese. Portugese from Portugal sound like Russian, spiting food, and a lisp. Brazilain Portugese is acutaly closer to the original Portugese than Portugese from Portugal.

"I took a course for Brazilian Portugese."

by carioca February 15, 2007

Portugese Whoopsadaisey

When you are performing oral sex on a woman and she breaks wind.

I was going down on this girl she came so hard she gave me a Portugese Whoopsadaisey

by Mr Horrific October 18, 2012

Portugese Icypole

A gift that involves one excreting a cable (poo) of at least 6 inches and placing the cable in aluminium foil and freezing it. The frozen cable is presented as a gift in frozen form.

"Gus is planning on giving me a Portugese Icypole for my birthday..I can't wait"

by Griff N. Dawe. April 9, 2008

portugese snowblower

The act of receiving an oral cumshot and blowing it back at your partner, trying to cover as many parts of their body in semen as possible

When Becky found out I fucked her sister, she waited until we had sex and then gave me the old portugese snowblower

by Guilbeaubaggins June 8, 2016

Portugese Cyclops

A sexual act in which one partner inserts his penis underneath the other's eyelid.

A: Why does Susan always wear that eyepatch?
B: About a year ago, I gave her the Portugese Cyclops.
A: High five!

by Oscitant September 27, 2011

Portugese Meatloaf

Start by going fishing with a lady off the coast of Portugal, and when she isn't looking you sneak up behind her and fuck her in the ass with a deep sea fishing pole until she starts to bleed. Collect the blood and shit mixture and keep it in a mason jar for safe keeping. Once she is unconscious from blood loss, beat her body with the catch of the day and then cover her in the blood and shit mixture from earlier like the ketchup on top of a meatloaf. Leave her out in the hot Portuguese sun to allow the mixture to bake on to her skin. Sail back to port and round up 2 native sweaty, poor, and stupid Portuguese sailers. Lure them on board with the promise of fresh fish and meatloaf. Once on board proceed to have sex with the unconscious woman in all of her orifices. Finally lock the Portuguese sailers in the cabin with the body, call the police, and leave.

I gotta find a boat, I feel like making Portugese Meatloaf tonight.

by sixteenoeight May 25, 2011