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Molesting a turd

Arousal or sexual pleasure derived from intentionally "Prairie Dogging" ones turd, making it slide in and out of the rectum.
"What took you so long in the bathroom?"

"Sorry, I was molesting a turd for a bit and had to wait for my erection to go away."

".... "

^ This is a good response if you don't want people to ask why you took long in the bathroom ever again
by Jwhitt March 21, 2010
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molesting

the plural definition for feeding moles to an animal
Wow jerry , stop molesting zara! your spoiling her !
by toeateggornottoeategg December 13, 2022
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molesting myself

The act of subjecting yourself to unwanted or improper sexual advances or activity, from yourself.

What masturbators do, even though everybody knows masturbation is a perverted sin that will eventually lead to blindness, really hairy hands and complete insanity. :-P
I spent all last night molesting myself. Damn, my dick is sore!
by tonyfamous October 8, 2010
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molesting a snake

Bob: I saw you molesting a snake Jill.
Jill: shut the fuck up that was my anorexic baby who still had the cord attached.
Bob: oh..........
by weedhead11111111111111111 March 14, 2018
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Mydestiny

Mydestiny is a beautiful and smart human being, she is very open about her opinion and tries her best to make everyone feel welcome. Mydestiny is very quite around people she doesn’t know, but near close friends she’s a different person. Mydestiny cares for everyone around her and loves all of her friends. She’s a great friend and gets good grades in most her work. She’s has a full heart and will always have it
Person: “Mydestiny is so quiet!”

Friend: “oh no she isn’t, if you get to know her at least!”
by Shawn_mendesLover December 13, 2018
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molesting your inner child

the act of masturbating to images that are animated in nature including cartoon characters, video game characters, action figures, dolls, and stuffed animals.
I feel kind of dirty. I watched "Who Framed Roger Rabbit" this afternoon and had to retire to the bathroom after the Jessica Rabbit scene to molest my inner child. <molesting your inner child>
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modelTini

A modelTini is a cocktail made with clear spirits and low or no calorie fillers. A model's secret to staying thin and enjoying herself at a party! Owner of the modelTini™ trademark is Ford model Shelley GoodStein.
"She drank an itsy bitsy, teeny weeny, skinny minnie modelTini!"
by Shelltacular November 9, 2012
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