I'll Slap You Into Next Week

To slap someone so hard that they fly into the next week. One might ask how this is possible and it is simple. You would have to smack someone so hard that their entire body would accelerate past the speed of light. Consequently, they would be traveling in time, assumably into the future. As a result, they would be slapped into next week!

Coco: >>;; I hate black people.
K': I'll slap you into next week if you don't stfu.

by Iconoklastic~ April 4, 2010

and then I found five dollars and a bag of weed

Some stories are so boring, even adding and then I found five dollars won't save them. Adding "and then I found five dollars and a bag of weed" to the end of your boring ass story, will validate for your friends all that time and facial expressiveness they just wasted listening to it, and they will remember why they are friends with you in the first place, because a friend with weed is a friend indeed.

"Oh man, Friday, I really wanted an egg salad sandwich and I was just obsessing about it and I was like, 'Man, I'm gonna make one of those.' So Saturday, I went out and got, like, a dozen eggs and then I boiled them all and I just, I spent, I dunno, probably three hours, like three and a half hours making, you know, the mayonnaise, and the onions and paprika and, you know, the necessary accoutrement. And then, by the time I was done, I didn't really feel like like eating it...and then I found five dollars and a bag of weed..."

"Bet you felt like eating the sandwich then! Oh man, when are we hanging out, Andy?"

by SchoolSaboteur May 15, 2010

i'll call you next week!

A lie, don't believe this

Awesome! I'll call you next week (fake smile)

by maybe yes maybe no June 29, 2004

I've had my weetabix

A phrase used when facing a difficult task.

Old man: Hey!

Young girls: Hey!

Old man: How about you two come back to mine?

Young girls: You sure you can handle it?

Old man: Don't worry love, I've had my weetabix.

by coolmarvin13 July 11, 2009

Smoke weed I did

Part of a poem by a Dr Zeus wanna-be

Sam I am
Smoke weed I did

by Bad C dev July 25, 2021

i just need to get through this week

this phrase is used as an attempt to delude one self that one will be alright with time. it's to give the impression that the pain one is currently going through is temporary when in fact it is permanent and will only get worse with time. often times, one is actually aware that nothing will ameliorate in the upcoming week. and should it, it would be a fleeting "improvement"
this phrase can be said to some else when they ask if you are okay, in order to avoid talking about the actually problems your are facing which are now pushing you to the brink of de-aliving yourself.

friend 1: are you okay bro, you've been really down the last couple of days

friend 2: haha, im fine. i just need to get through this week

friend 1: real af

by bester_remontada April 16, 2023

I DJ on the weekends

I DJ on the weekends

A cool way to say you don't do anything important. During a conversation, when a person asks the other what they do, and that other person does't really do anything, they don't want to say they do nothing and not appear interesting to the other individual. By saying they DJ on the weekends, it makes them seem interesting and more fun to hang out with.

People add this phrase under hobbies for their myspace/facebook pages to seem interesting.

Dave: So John, what do you do?

John: I DJ on the weekends.

Dave: Really? That's awesome!

by Hip_Hop_Anonymous July 2, 2011