the cartoon defense

The defense of an action because it occurred in a cartoon.
Nothing is a serious issue if it previously was featured in a cartoon, in that case the action is clearly meant to be all fun and games, and if you disagree you suck.

I wasn't harassing and stalking that woman, Pepe le Pew does it all the time.
Classic use of the Cartoon Defense.

by James Dracon February 7, 2013

The Crab Defense

The greatest Beer Pong distraction since tits.

We don't have breasts. Let's try the Crab Defense instead.

by Seriously Cheese June 16, 2010

bath salt defense

When a basketball player plays such lockdown defense, that he might as well be eating the other player's face.

You can't score on Andre Iguodala easily because he plays Bath Salt defense.

by zharper0 August 9, 2012

yuppie-nuremberg defense

the "yuppie nuremberg" defense is when someone does something they know is wrong but tries justify it by simply saying they're doing it for the money. typically a lame excuse. . from the film, "thank you for smoking."

1; You know what your doing is wrong.
2; Everybody has a mortgage to pay.
1; Ah, the yuppie-nuremberg defense.

by markymark44 March 7, 2010

Mel Gibson Defense

Using alcoholism to cover one's mistakes, like blaming Jews for all the world's wars. You can pretty much say anything you want, as long as your drunk it doesn't count. You also get special treatment later because you have a problem.

Jim call his boss a douche bag but he didn't get fired. He used the Mel Gibson Defense and actually ended up getiing a promotion for admitting his problem. Fucking Shithead!!

by Superfli21 November 13, 2006

9/11 Defense

1. A mechanism in which you invoke the spirit of the legislation, executive directive, and politcal mindset used in the wake of the 9/11 terrorist attacks to justify inappropriate, unethical, extreme, or illegal behaviors one involves themselves in.

Person: How'd you get away with taking pictures of your neighbor through her window?

You: Well, she is an imigrant - so ya know, 9/11 defense.

Person: aaaah, nice.

by JackSpayed October 23, 2009

i drop kicked that child in self defense

the child stuck their tongue out so you drop kick that child in self defense

Technoblade: Officer I drop kicked that child in self defense

by i swear my name is andrew September 10, 2021