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clusterfail

When you suddenly, completely, and epicly fail (see epic fail) at EVERYTHING YOU POSSIBLY COULD for no particular reason, and with no action you could have possibly taken, even if you had known that these events would occur for the entire duration of your mortal existence.
Total extinction of the majority of life on Earth, your girlfriend is cheating on you, and you just learned that Satan has doomed you to reincarnate as a McDonald's cherry pie?

Clusterfail.
by Mosher of 603 January 23, 2009
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Clusterslap

A series of slaps given using one or both hands, within a short period of time. Its like a single slap, but better.
If you say that fucking word one more time ima clusterslap you.
by .anna. November 24, 2009
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clusterflake

clusterflake is the social phenomenon characterized by a buttload of people just not showing up, typically so sporadically, in such numbers, and with so little advance warning that the original plan or plans are thrown into disintegrating disarray. (syn: cluster flake)
"Despite a week's notice more than half the movie group clusterflaked, most without even calling."

"We'd arranged a big dinner, followed by a meet with another crew, then all hit a party downtown. Three people showed up in total, the whole night. It was a complete cluster flake."
by Dude I Flaked April 21, 2008
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clusterfluffle

a SNAFU of sorts. a classy cross between the terms clusterfuck and kerfluffle.
My spouse and I were both adopted at birth. After searching for our birth parents for many years, we found ourselves in a clusterfluffle when we discovered that we had the same birth mother and were actually siblings.
by speedymama May 22, 2010
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clusterflux

A situation that is in such a state of change and uncertainty, that it can not even be deemed a legitimate clusterfuck.
For three weeks, the 2000 presidential election was in a state of clusterflux.
by politicalJunky1896 November 4, 2011
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clusterfrack

First defined by Joseph Gatts on YouTube in October of 2015 in application to the realm of Steven Universe, clusterfrack refers to the process of pumping synthetic tears of Rose Quartz into the core of the earth in order to effect the emergence of the Cluster (a massive fusion of millions of shattered Gems).

This term derives from fracking which refers to the process of either inseminating or pumping something into the Earth to aid in oil drilling operations. In all three cases, the end result is the emergence of either an infant, crude oil, or the Cluster.
After deeming it unsuitable for Gem settlement, the Homeworld Gems decided to clusterfrack the Earth in order to experiment on the effect of synthetic lacrimal essence upon Gem shards.
by Goseph Jatts November 30, 2015
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clusterfrak

syn. "clusterfuck." clean version of "clusterfuck" employing the jargon of the Battlestar Galactica universe; "frak" meaning "fuck."
clusterfrak It's a total clusterfrak, man!
by Ogg-the-Bull January 27, 2011
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