Person 1: Look at all those bears coming towards us!
Person 2: Dear God... it's the bear calvary.
Person 3: OSHI-
Person 2: Dear God... it's the bear calvary.
Person 3: OSHI-
by BrettyB May 10, 2008
A cage of misery and despair located in Lansdale, PA.
A cesspool of conservative, fundamentalist, self-righteous, ignorant assholes.
A cesspool of conservative, fundamentalist, self-righteous, ignorant assholes.
North Penn Kid: Hey, you go to Calvary, right?
Calvary Baptist School Kid: Please don't talk to me, you are of the world, and they tell me world is evil! You believe in EVILution and believe monkeys "evolved" into man over BILLIONS of years. Monkeys can't even live a billion years! How come we cant speak monkey? If we did evolve from monkeys then how come babies aren't born monkeys? I am 100% pro-life, unless we're talking about capital punishment, in which case I am 100% pro-death! If u have sex before marriage then in God's eyes u are married to that person. If a man rapes a woman, in Gods eyes they are married, it sucks for the girl but what can we do lol! There are NO exceptions to abortion whatsoever. It is God's will that the woman was impregnated, and therefore she must birth the child! If she was in fact raped, she must play the hand that was dealt to her, accept it as God's Will, and raise the interracial baby as her own. A woman wants to abort a rape child? She should have thought of that before she walked down that dark alley without a male present, not to mention she should have thought before putting on revealing attire. In the real world homosexuals (especially males) are generally predatory perverts who wouldn't think twice about bedding a 14 yo boy. You want to think that "Will and Grace" is a realistic picture of homosexuality. You're wrong. It doesn't show the incredibly widespread depression, drug use, disease and utter depravity of the homosexual fetish community....blah blah blah bullshit bullshit...
North Penn Kid: I'll take that as a yes...
Calvary Baptist School Kid: Please don't talk to me, you are of the world, and they tell me world is evil! You believe in EVILution and believe monkeys "evolved" into man over BILLIONS of years. Monkeys can't even live a billion years! How come we cant speak monkey? If we did evolve from monkeys then how come babies aren't born monkeys? I am 100% pro-life, unless we're talking about capital punishment, in which case I am 100% pro-death! If u have sex before marriage then in God's eyes u are married to that person. If a man rapes a woman, in Gods eyes they are married, it sucks for the girl but what can we do lol! There are NO exceptions to abortion whatsoever. It is God's will that the woman was impregnated, and therefore she must birth the child! If she was in fact raped, she must play the hand that was dealt to her, accept it as God's Will, and raise the interracial baby as her own. A woman wants to abort a rape child? She should have thought of that before she walked down that dark alley without a male present, not to mention she should have thought before putting on revealing attire. In the real world homosexuals (especially males) are generally predatory perverts who wouldn't think twice about bedding a 14 yo boy. You want to think that "Will and Grace" is a realistic picture of homosexuality. You're wrong. It doesn't show the incredibly widespread depression, drug use, disease and utter depravity of the homosexual fetish community....blah blah blah bullshit bullshit...
North Penn Kid: I'll take that as a yes...
by Dave Hanes April 15, 2008
noun: a time zone found in Calvary Chapel schools which throw off all plans of meeting friends and being on time to important events on time. Can be found frustrating when used as an excuse for being late to school, and you recieve a lovely little yellow slip after all efforts to get out of being late.
Kid: But my alarm was set to the correct time!
Office Person: Well it should've been set to Calvary Chapel Time, and you know it.
Kid: ... you guys suck, I know you do this on purpose...
(Admininstrator walks in from survellance room)
Admin: He knows too much...
Kid: NO! DON'T!! AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!
Office Person: Well it should've been set to Calvary Chapel Time, and you know it.
Kid: ... you guys suck, I know you do this on purpose...
(Admininstrator walks in from survellance room)
Admin: He knows too much...
Kid: NO! DON'T!! AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!
by Oddjobguy November 23, 2005
A "school" that was founded in 1990. Since then it has dedicated itself to covering youths ears and shouting " LALALALALA We Cant Hear You! LALALALALALALA". The math department consists of a sub-standard curriculum. One would be able to pass the geometry final by putting "Jesus" for every answer. The English department Curriculum is passed on protestant ideals. During the study of The Scarlet Letter, the teacher tried convincing students that the Puritans were right! History Consists of everything that involved Christians. According to them, the Muslims started the crusades. Every student is required to take a bible class each year. In the case that you graduate in your Junior year and recieve a state accepted diploma with the Schools name on it, you are still not allowed to walk at graduation, simply because you dont have 4 years of bible. All students are required to attend chapel, where we are force feed Calvary's hypercritical view on Christianity. If you have sex, you're a sinner and are going to hell. If you drink, you're a sinner and are going to hell. If you go into the military instead of going to a christian college, you're a sinner and are going to hell.
by Sickened by Calvary October 17, 2010
A shitty school that forces religion harder than the fucking dress code. The school that had a better meme page in 2017 than the academics. Calvary is for pussy’s
by CCABIRDS January 18, 2019
many homosexuals in a homophobic school 😍 most kids are stuck up barbies or bogans along with the alt kids and kids with zero style what so ever. the religion gets forced down everyone’s throats to the point of hatred towards every staff member.
calvary christian college townsville is fucking dumb ☺️☺️
by christian69420 March 12, 2021
The only high school that will let you wear any kind of swimsuit at the annual luau but doesn’t let you wear shorts that go above the knee. The current principal and superintendent acts like an angel in front of parents but is a completely different person around students. Any abnormally colored hair will get you expelled but doing drugs will only get you suspended. The Bible, science, and math teachers will always be your favorite because they are the coolest. Staff will always get on your nerves. The AP Euro, World, and Art History teacher assigns an absurd amount of homework that will make you and to kys. Don’t take any of her classes. You should probably just go to another school.
student: “yo Calvary Chapel High School is kinda toxic my guy.”
other student: “yeah i know broski. we should totally go to like Mater Dei or something like that.”
other student: “yeah i know broski. we should totally go to like Mater Dei or something like that.”
by juuls_r_not_cuul June 20, 2019