almond joy 

When a guy shits on a girls chest, rubs her tits in it, and then proceeds to clip his toe nails into the feces.

"Hey bob, I gave you're wife an almond joy last night"

almond joy by Jon and barry October 27, 2006

Almond Joy 

When a man has diarrhea and it covers his testicals. He can let it dry on his testicals and then let someone lick it off.
Female version of this is a "Mounds"

Jeff had the shits all day, so when I got home he gave me an almond joy.

Almond Joy by malcum ex November 22, 2010

almond joy 

a person who is only attractive sometimes.

John Mayer is an almond joy.

almond joy by meagan and jenn April 25, 2005

Almond Joy 

When a man's genitals are fondled by a partner.

Jack: Jill came over gave me almond joy last night.

Ben: lucky bastard!

Almond Joy by really there are no names left September 23, 2010

almond joy 

The act in which a man lays a dump across a girl's pussy and then proceeds to ejaculate on the excrement.

Dude, I totally gave Suzy an almond joy last night!

almond joy by tomphoofer August 13, 2007

almond joy 

the act of using marzipan as sexual lubricant

"I gave my girlfriend the almond joy last night.....my dick feels like it's been through a belt sander"

almond joy by impervious May 16, 2008

Almond Joy 

The act of inserting ones genitals in their lovers vagina when you're unable to go deeper.

Amanda wanted clinger to go deeper when he was already balls deep so he almond joy'd the shit out of her.

Almond Joy by Nate716 April 28, 2015