A weekend you spend with you girlfriend/boyfriend that is so boring that you resort to wanking in their bathrooms. This mostly happens when your other half forces you to watch chick flicks like How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days or any other Mathew McConaughey movie.
Jack: Tom did you have fun at Jordans last weekend?
Tom: No it was one of those "Wanking Weekends" I've been having alot recently!
Jack: Oh I see....fucking Mathew McConaughey!!!
Tom: No it was one of those "Wanking Weekends" I've been having alot recently!
Jack: Oh I see....fucking Mathew McConaughey!!!
by pirate phillip December 03, 2009
by vulga February 01, 2011
A pressure wank will take sometime to organize. Firstly one needs a Demijohn type vessel with a faulty fermentation lock. Secondly add to the Demijohn all the usual items to allow the fermentation process to develop. Timing is crucial! After 2 months in direct sunlight the contents of the Demijohn should be ripe for the rip! Note: awaiting for the perfect moment means commitment I.e. staying with the vessel 24 hours a day till its ready.
Since the fermentation lock is faulty the pressure should be quite powerful so please wear the appropriate gear. ( a strong tissue placed on the head and a bandage).
When the moment of the spurt of the bacterially infected juices comes! Place the tip of your placid willy or bell upon the faulty fermentation lock and tape (with gaffer) till sealed!
There will be a slight pause then...wooooooooooooooooo f! watch your cock balloon and balls crack with the liquid wonderment speeding through your Jappipe!
And enjoy till empty.
pressure wank is also known as: Drain My Fat "Lady Jane " from the french : dame-jeanne.
Since the fermentation lock is faulty the pressure should be quite powerful so please wear the appropriate gear. ( a strong tissue placed on the head and a bandage).
When the moment of the spurt of the bacterially infected juices comes! Place the tip of your placid willy or bell upon the faulty fermentation lock and tape (with gaffer) till sealed!
There will be a slight pause then...wooooooooooooooooo f! watch your cock balloon and balls crack with the liquid wonderment speeding through your Jappipe!
And enjoy till empty.
pressure wank is also known as: Drain My Fat "Lady Jane " from the french : dame-jeanne.
pressure wank is also known as: Drain My Fat "Lady Jane " from the french : dame-jeanne.
You could also try Anal Scrumping! Using the same process but aimed up the wrong en!
You could also try Anal Scrumping! Using the same process but aimed up the wrong en!
by Karlos April 25, 2007
Only for those who are true hardcore mutha fuckas.
To beat one off with the aid of a chainsaw, or if truly a balla-ass nigga, duel chainsaws (2) SHALL BE USED TO RUB ONE OUT. boo YAH!
And it goes without sayin, being hardcore as fuck is perfectly acceptable comprimise for bloodloss.
Only the foolish or the brave but foolish or the hard as fuckin nails steps up to the chainsaw wank.
To beat one off with the aid of a chainsaw, or if truly a balla-ass nigga, duel chainsaws (2) SHALL BE USED TO RUB ONE OUT. boo YAH!
And it goes without sayin, being hardcore as fuck is perfectly acceptable comprimise for bloodloss.
Only the foolish or the brave but foolish or the hard as fuckin nails steps up to the chainsaw wank.
Bizzle dawg:
Oi don't mess with him, that blokes ard as fuck, has a chainsaw wank before breakfast.
Dooche Larou:
Fuck me!
Oi don't mess with him, that blokes ard as fuck, has a chainsaw wank before breakfast.
Dooche Larou:
Fuck me!
by Jonny Bell May 25, 2008
female 1: omg you just came inside
female 2: but so did you omg
male 1: ladies im ugly im good in bed lets fuck
male 2: your a homo
male 3: well thats the big wank
female 2: but so did you omg
male 1: ladies im ugly im good in bed lets fuck
male 2: your a homo
male 3: well thats the big wank
by patriot brony October 14, 2013
When the Edinburgh Fringe is imminent and you're so uncontrollably excited that you just have to touch yourself.
Dave was so aroused by the Fringe 2015 programme that he had to lock himself in his bedroom due to a severe case of the Festival Wanks.
When Dave found out that extra shows were being added he had to take a week off from work as he found himself suffering from a crippling repetitive stain injury.
#festivalwanks
When Dave found out that extra shows were being added he had to take a week off from work as he found himself suffering from a crippling repetitive stain injury.
#festivalwanks
by Denny Duquette May 11, 2015
by Jascebalon March 26, 2016